Yesterday being at work and the long trip home was bad enough where I had to deliver something to someone in another workplace and then had to on my way home by on hold on the phone for over an hour only for it to be just to schedule an appointment for the actual phone interview this coming week. After this I was a mental trainwreck, in fact by the end of the last shift post all of my food experiments this week and the one shift for my second job using up more of my body's limited energy reserves I could barely speak but was at least able to do so more quietly in a more relaxed environment. The only real good thing now is I have replaced all supplements with additives with supplements with a tiny amount of rice flour at most in them as well as getting rice cakes and eliminated all seed oils besides my peanut butter and chia seeds in the morning which I unfortunately have no better alternatives for..
But when we got into the restaurant which was no longer the same one as before I could eat at with little issue and opened the menu I got that sinking feeling. There was only one vegan option if I excluded mayo on one item and nothing I could eat with seafood that wasn't cross contaminated with land animal products. So I asked for something with beef replaced with shrimp minus one other ingredient in it that was some kind of animal fat. It came with it on it and shrimp on the side so they obviously didn't understand which was understandable as the person who served us didn't appear to know much english. So I tell them and they take it back, then not 10 minutes later it comes out again with shrimp. I was too brain foggy already to notice something was a bit off about that so I have some and notice after some bites that they literally just took the beef off top and put the shrimp on it and I also found tiny pieces of it still in there. When I also still tasted the beef on there (there may have even been some beef ingredient they cooked the shrimp with) I got that sinking feeling as I knew I just made the biggest mistake of the week. I should have not even touched it and probably wouldn't have if I wasn't so cognitively impaired at the time already.
Immediately after I felt that familiar beef reaction setting in, now that I have experience here I notice it's very distinct. Odd trippy sedated feeling, high brain pressure, easily confused and short term memory goes to the dogs, speech goes out the window, off balance and spatial perception all messed up, and weird burny face feelings. Of course on the way back to get some activated charcoal we hit every red light as it gets worse but luckily when I finally got back and had some a larger amount down the hatch helped ease the blow even though I was still really messed up for the rest of the night. After going shopping in the mall quick before getting to the theater place in it and never being so happy in my life to find a stall selling plain salted pretzel bites (in my stressed out, beef reactive delirious state the lady working there probably thought I had completely lost my marbles which isn't far from the truth anyways) I felt like I was in a different dimension. The movie itself was actually pretty good despite how I was feeling and it at least provided some sort of isolated space for me to detach from everything else in for a while which is one of the reasons I'm starting to grow pretty fond of going to see late night movies now .
This morning I'm just feeling pretty messed up but not horrifically bad, waking up was a pain as I kept getting confused on what day it was and what I had to do on it indicating the beef reaction is still hanging around a bit. Feels kind of hangover like with its "what the hell even happened yesterday" feeling. Whatever it is like the tuna thing it sets in very quickly upon hitting my guts. Today and tomorrow I'm going to be dinner fasting to help reset this and going vegan again for a while. Also things may get slightly better now that I kicked up tortilla chips with various seed oils in them and supplements with additives. Tonight I have work at my other job which I'm not looking forward to as it's going to mess me up more but after this shift I have one more week left there to survive through. I'm amazed at how just 1 to 2 extra shifts piled on to my morning job from monday to friday can make or break everything about me like that. I notice with my new one too that day 3 is when even if I get lots of breaks and my coworkers support me well my brain and socialization begins to hit the wall and thursday/friday turns into a rush to the finish line. Right now I just hope I recover quickly from this big slip up.
But when we got into the restaurant which was no longer the same one as before I could eat at with little issue and opened the menu I got that sinking feeling. There was only one vegan option if I excluded mayo on one item and nothing I could eat with seafood that wasn't cross contaminated with land animal products. So I asked for something with beef replaced with shrimp minus one other ingredient in it that was some kind of animal fat. It came with it on it and shrimp on the side so they obviously didn't understand which was understandable as the person who served us didn't appear to know much english. So I tell them and they take it back, then not 10 minutes later it comes out again with shrimp. I was too brain foggy already to notice something was a bit off about that so I have some and notice after some bites that they literally just took the beef off top and put the shrimp on it and I also found tiny pieces of it still in there. When I also still tasted the beef on there (there may have even been some beef ingredient they cooked the shrimp with) I got that sinking feeling as I knew I just made the biggest mistake of the week. I should have not even touched it and probably wouldn't have if I wasn't so cognitively impaired at the time already.
Immediately after I felt that familiar beef reaction setting in, now that I have experience here I notice it's very distinct. Odd trippy sedated feeling, high brain pressure, easily confused and short term memory goes to the dogs, speech goes out the window, off balance and spatial perception all messed up, and weird burny face feelings. Of course on the way back to get some activated charcoal we hit every red light as it gets worse but luckily when I finally got back and had some a larger amount down the hatch helped ease the blow even though I was still really messed up for the rest of the night. After going shopping in the mall quick before getting to the theater place in it and never being so happy in my life to find a stall selling plain salted pretzel bites (in my stressed out, beef reactive delirious state the lady working there probably thought I had completely lost my marbles which isn't far from the truth anyways) I felt like I was in a different dimension. The movie itself was actually pretty good despite how I was feeling and it at least provided some sort of isolated space for me to detach from everything else in for a while which is one of the reasons I'm starting to grow pretty fond of going to see late night movies now .
This morning I'm just feeling pretty messed up but not horrifically bad, waking up was a pain as I kept getting confused on what day it was and what I had to do on it indicating the beef reaction is still hanging around a bit. Feels kind of hangover like with its "what the hell even happened yesterday" feeling. Whatever it is like the tuna thing it sets in very quickly upon hitting my guts. Today and tomorrow I'm going to be dinner fasting to help reset this and going vegan again for a while. Also things may get slightly better now that I kicked up tortilla chips with various seed oils in them and supplements with additives. Tonight I have work at my other job which I'm not looking forward to as it's going to mess me up more but after this shift I have one more week left there to survive through. I'm amazed at how just 1 to 2 extra shifts piled on to my morning job from monday to friday can make or break everything about me like that. I notice with my new one too that day 3 is when even if I get lots of breaks and my coworkers support me well my brain and socialization begins to hit the wall and thursday/friday turns into a rush to the finish line. Right now I just hope I recover quickly from this big slip up.
