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Willing to Rest for now

Wednesday, October 7, 2009

The weather has turned cooler and overcast these days. Summer is over.

It seems every year that in the change of seasons from summer to fall, I experience some downturn. Some years have been worse than others. This fall so far has been, I think, the gentlest one in over a decade.

I havent gone out even for a walk, in over a week. That has something to do with windy, rainy weather. It also has to do with a lower level of energy. And a recent reminder of how much I dont like to crash. So I am playing it safe at present.

Unlike other autumns, though, I feel some contentment with this quieter life. I dont really feel a desire to go uptown, for instance. To do the grocery shopping. To scan the streets for someone I know.

The loneliness is not nearly what it was such a short time ago. That has everything to do with having formed friendships on the net, and with having some work online as well.

I no longer fear that if I disappeared, nobody would notice. I no longer believe that if I were to vanish, nobody would come to look for me.

This is a source of contentment for me.


Beautifully written and thought provoking. I think, I too, am getting more accepting...

I only recently started networking and making friends on the net....it has most certainly helped with the loneliness and isolation. I feel there are people "out there" who understand.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Marian.

It's amazing how much difference it can make, knowing that someone else hears you, and that they want to keep hearing you. :)

Every chronic should have a computer. Preferably a laptop, so they can take it to bed with them if they have to.

And then they should all come to Cort's forums. :D

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