Five separate (blog) writing efforts have been initiated in the past several weeks, yet I have not posted anything. As best I can tell, I'm having difficulty completing the thought. Or perhaps, I'm having difficulty determining whether or not the subject matter offered is at all worthwhile to anybody.
Right now, I'm back in bed, back in the same bedroom, back in a similar situation under similar circumstances to the ones that kept me bed bound for six years consecutively.
There are, of course, differences. Come August, I should regain my freedom, as that's when they are promising to install the stairlift. And even while being stuck upstairs, I am able to go out on the balcony - if and when someone is willing and able to bring me outside.
Note: the rubber ramp to the exterior is too steep, and / or too slippery, thus I cannot get the manual or electric wheelchair outside (much less, back inside) by myself.
In all honesty, I wouldn't be spending all that much time outside right now anyway. We've been as warm as 115 degrees as of late. Fortunately, and somewhat surprisingly, monsoon season kicked in earlier than usual, thanks to Tropical Storm Alberto ushering in copious amounts of moisture. Due to this, temperatures have moderated into the lower 110s, but the humidity is way the heck up there. And the evenings are no longer cooling off.
Note: We just had our hottest June on record. Sooner than later, no one will be able to live in the Desert Southwest, due to the extreme temperatures and lack of water.
But the clouds, yes we've got those forming over the mountains and elsewhere! All kinds of cumulus congestus blowing up all over the place, aiming towards the top of the stratosphere. We've mostly been rain-free here on the desert floor, with the exception being just over a half inch received a few nights ago. Still, I am grateful for the early arrival of the monsoon season - unpredictable elements add to this spice and variety of a life partially lived.
Even as I sit outside this morning, the sky is overcast from end to end. Quite unusual in the desert environs, especially in late June / early July.
Totally (in-depth) Health Update
My health isn't all that awful. Everybody suffers, so I’ll spare you the details (you're welcome).
Passions for People
My relations with my former wife are mostly agreeable. She's occasionally engaged, but primarily detached. Two weeks ago I expressed my desire for more frequent and direct interactions, so we've been playing board games every so often - a game called backgammon.
Besides her, I do have caregivers from 9:00 a.m. to noon, which presents varying opportunities for socialization. For the Tuesday through Friday time frame it's my regularly scheduled Navajo Woman. The visit typically includes up to 20 minutes worth of story time, depicting life on the reservation or other life happenings.
And then every Monday, it's a mystery mix and match.
Why?
Because my regular caregiver can't come on Monday's, they send me a wide variety of caregiving others, which, in a general sense, is good for me. That gives me someone new to engage at weekly intervals.
Otherwise, there ain't much happening on my end. My routine consists of waking up at the crack of dawn. Lying quietly in bed while considering my options. Then eventually manipulating the laptop while composing new abstract barely listenable music material. Then every so often I sit upright and take a look around, before reclining. And then maybe, I check out a Star Trek episode or watch a YouTube video involving cops, or perhaps some live storm chasing.
Variety
I did have to go to the hospital a couple of weeks ago for unilateral pulsatile tinnitus issues, combined with carotid artery neck pain. I was freaking out a bit, dealing with that for a month. The tests and scans thus far do not indicate a blockage, so more possibly it's cranial instability of some sort / misaligned upper vertebrae - which may possibly (doubtfully) play a role in my severe gastroparesis, having my vagus nerve impinged upon and constricted between the carotid artery and the jugular vein, etc. But probably not.
All-encompassing Self-diagnosis
Most likely it's my longstanding celiac disease, combined with damaged intestinal villi (that do not absorb vitamin D) that caused my severe gastroparesis, and then in turn, contributed to my overactive autoimmune system / leaky gut, etc.
Beyond that, my oral surgery scheduled for Friday had to be postponed due to a series of clusterflubs. The idea was to also have my feeding tube replaced while I was under general anesthesia, but orchestrating these efforts frustratingly failed (for now). I keep having to postpone as no one will help me. Yes, I am nearly at my wits end.
Positively Positive Environs
I've got air conditioning.
I am safe (in comparison to living in the garage)
I have a nice sliced view of the mountains and palm trees and (on occasion) cumulonimbus clouds.
I have internet access.
And it's super quiet all night long.
All that right there is enough to survive, a sort of Hierarchy of Needs being met.
Rapping Up
So you had to figure this would be kind of a boring blog entry, wouldn't you? And lo and behold, it is!
I have had some interesting interactions with medical personnel, a couple of caregivers, and a few “shouting down to my neighbors below” opportunities, but that's about the extent of my true life experiences upstairs.
Sooner than later, I'll be able to escape this bedroom, and also eventually, it won't be 1000 degrees outside. And then I'll have a whole different set of variables to work with in regards to direct and active socializing.
Take care,
Howard
from the balcony
at the office of doctors
a glorious stuck in-bed self-selfie within the purple palatial estate where I quietly reside
the ugly outdoors (rest of the week)
Right now, I'm back in bed, back in the same bedroom, back in a similar situation under similar circumstances to the ones that kept me bed bound for six years consecutively.
There are, of course, differences. Come August, I should regain my freedom, as that's when they are promising to install the stairlift. And even while being stuck upstairs, I am able to go out on the balcony - if and when someone is willing and able to bring me outside.
Note: the rubber ramp to the exterior is too steep, and / or too slippery, thus I cannot get the manual or electric wheelchair outside (much less, back inside) by myself.
In all honesty, I wouldn't be spending all that much time outside right now anyway. We've been as warm as 115 degrees as of late. Fortunately, and somewhat surprisingly, monsoon season kicked in earlier than usual, thanks to Tropical Storm Alberto ushering in copious amounts of moisture. Due to this, temperatures have moderated into the lower 110s, but the humidity is way the heck up there. And the evenings are no longer cooling off.
Note: We just had our hottest June on record. Sooner than later, no one will be able to live in the Desert Southwest, due to the extreme temperatures and lack of water.
But the clouds, yes we've got those forming over the mountains and elsewhere! All kinds of cumulus congestus blowing up all over the place, aiming towards the top of the stratosphere. We've mostly been rain-free here on the desert floor, with the exception being just over a half inch received a few nights ago. Still, I am grateful for the early arrival of the monsoon season - unpredictable elements add to this spice and variety of a life partially lived.
Even as I sit outside this morning, the sky is overcast from end to end. Quite unusual in the desert environs, especially in late June / early July.
Totally (in-depth) Health Update
My health isn't all that awful. Everybody suffers, so I’ll spare you the details (you're welcome).
Passions for People
My relations with my former wife are mostly agreeable. She's occasionally engaged, but primarily detached. Two weeks ago I expressed my desire for more frequent and direct interactions, so we've been playing board games every so often - a game called backgammon.
Besides her, I do have caregivers from 9:00 a.m. to noon, which presents varying opportunities for socialization. For the Tuesday through Friday time frame it's my regularly scheduled Navajo Woman. The visit typically includes up to 20 minutes worth of story time, depicting life on the reservation or other life happenings.
And then every Monday, it's a mystery mix and match.
Why?
Because my regular caregiver can't come on Monday's, they send me a wide variety of caregiving others, which, in a general sense, is good for me. That gives me someone new to engage at weekly intervals.
Otherwise, there ain't much happening on my end. My routine consists of waking up at the crack of dawn. Lying quietly in bed while considering my options. Then eventually manipulating the laptop while composing new abstract barely listenable music material. Then every so often I sit upright and take a look around, before reclining. And then maybe, I check out a Star Trek episode or watch a YouTube video involving cops, or perhaps some live storm chasing.
Variety
I did have to go to the hospital a couple of weeks ago for unilateral pulsatile tinnitus issues, combined with carotid artery neck pain. I was freaking out a bit, dealing with that for a month. The tests and scans thus far do not indicate a blockage, so more possibly it's cranial instability of some sort / misaligned upper vertebrae - which may possibly (doubtfully) play a role in my severe gastroparesis, having my vagus nerve impinged upon and constricted between the carotid artery and the jugular vein, etc. But probably not.
All-encompassing Self-diagnosis
Most likely it's my longstanding celiac disease, combined with damaged intestinal villi (that do not absorb vitamin D) that caused my severe gastroparesis, and then in turn, contributed to my overactive autoimmune system / leaky gut, etc.
Beyond that, my oral surgery scheduled for Friday had to be postponed due to a series of clusterflubs. The idea was to also have my feeding tube replaced while I was under general anesthesia, but orchestrating these efforts frustratingly failed (for now). I keep having to postpone as no one will help me. Yes, I am nearly at my wits end.
Positively Positive Environs
I've got air conditioning.
I am safe (in comparison to living in the garage)
I have a nice sliced view of the mountains and palm trees and (on occasion) cumulonimbus clouds.
I have internet access.
And it's super quiet all night long.
All that right there is enough to survive, a sort of Hierarchy of Needs being met.
Rapping Up
So you had to figure this would be kind of a boring blog entry, wouldn't you? And lo and behold, it is!
I have had some interesting interactions with medical personnel, a couple of caregivers, and a few “shouting down to my neighbors below” opportunities, but that's about the extent of my true life experiences upstairs.
Sooner than later, I'll be able to escape this bedroom, and also eventually, it won't be 1000 degrees outside. And then I'll have a whole different set of variables to work with in regards to direct and active socializing.
Take care,
Howard
from the balcony
at the office of doctors
a glorious stuck in-bed self-selfie within the purple palatial estate where I quietly reside
the ugly outdoors (rest of the week)
