• Welcome to Phoenix Rising!

    Created in 2008, Phoenix Rising is the largest and oldest forum dedicated to furthering the understanding of and finding treatments for complex chronic illnesses such as chronic fatigue syndrome (ME/CFS), fibromyalgia (FM), long COVID, postural orthostatic tachycardia syndrome (POTS), mast cell activation syndrome (MCAS), and allied diseases.

    To become a member, simply click the Register button at the top right.

Anyone live in a townhouse?

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
HI all!

I've been trying to buy a house and it's just been a nightmare. I'm so sick, I can barely manage life and all the stress.

Homes are so expensive it's insane. Prices have doubled in some areas in just the last year.

So....thinking maybe i could get a townhouse. I worry most about stairs. I can't really manage stairs much and townhomes tend to be three stories with laundry on lowest level. And how to bring in supplies? When I lived with my dad at home, I could park my car close to the front door and walk very short ways to bring in things. but even with that, i couldn't carry in water jugs or heavy boxes or kitty litter so i would scoot them on the porch and push them just inside the door of the one level home. On bad days just walking a short distance to the kitchen could be rough in the one level home.
Did anyone adjust to living with stairs with this illness and living by themselves? And how do you get deliveries like for cat litter or Amazon?

too much to think about and stress about with barely life left in me but trying to find some solutions to get at least close to home again so i can shop and know how to get things done.

Would love to hear about others experiences adjusting to stairs of the noise of townhomes or other things. I so miss having a home I could easily live in and the quiet and the freedom.
 

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
And with a home, I wash out the kitties litter boxes outside. How do you wash them out in a townhouse? For those who have kitties, that is......I would assume people without kitties don't just get litter boxes and wash them out. hehe....
 

hmnr asg

Senior Member
Messages
558
Hi
I was also trying to buy a house but after the recent price surge its a hopeless cause for me. So im thinking of giving up , wish i had bought before covid :(

Stairs are also very hard for me. Thankfully in my duplex apartment our bathroom is beside my bedroom. So I rarely have to go downstairs. I'm lucky that my wife brings me food and water upstairs. So I rarely go down.

We also have a cat. To make my life easier I'm now using disposable litter boxes so i don't have to wash them. you can just throw them away and they are made from recycled newspaper. They last a long time:

https://www.chewy.com/natures-miracle-disposable-cat-litter/dp/47596
or
https://smile.amazon.com/Natures-Miracle-Disposable-Litter-2-Pack/dp/B07JZ38GJN/
(make sure to get the jumbo size)

Also if youre planning on buying a place by yourself, maybe a condo or a townhouse is more cfs friendly. I think a house takes more effort and upkeep than a condo. (just my opinion).
 

IThinkImTurningJapanese

Senior Member
Messages
3,492
Location
Japan
So....thinking maybe i could get a townhouse. I worry most about stairs. I can't really manage stairs much and townhomes tend to be three stories with laundry on lowest level.

I've got a three story house and I'm fine with it. I don't even minimize my trips up. But I know I couldn't do this without treatment.

As it stands, I refer to my house as my StairMaster. :D
 

Tammy

Senior Member
Messages
2,181
Location
New Mexico
When I first moved into the apt. complex I now live in........all they had was a unit available upstairs. It was really hard. Never again. The first chance that a floor level unit became available, I grabbed it. From what you have posted, I would strongly suggest finding a place without stairs.
 

hapl808

Senior Member
Messages
2,052
I would be completely unable to do that at this point. My only methods of getting around are crutches or wheelchair, so a house (especially with interior stairs) would not be doable. Five years ago stairs would've been relatively easy for me even when moderate and I stayed in many places that had them. A little exhausting, but so was everything. On the severe end of the scale, making it to the bathroom or kitchen is about all I can handle.
 

Rufous McKinney

Senior Member
Messages
13,251
Did anyone adjust to living with stairs with this illness and living by themselves? And how do you get deliveries like for cat litter or Amazon?

I live upstairs, with my more invalid husband who has a cane etc. Several nice neighbors.

Its a bit of a challenge. But not impossible for me.

So I am not all alone, but my husband can't carry much.

Most deliveries show up outside my door, however, not the HEAVIEST BOX. so sometimes, my neighbor will see it and bring it up.

Funny, moving in, I had some items I'd just sit by the stairs and they levitate. Some downstairs guests were forced to carry some of it up for us, by the nice nieghbor who sees us as rather needy.

I did get Von's deliveries, show up outside my door.

Mostly I have to pace trips, so sometimes only one gallon of water gets retrieved, the others just wait longer.

Laundry can be tiring, I can manage one load but that is three stair trips- risky, so i watch it.

Garbage takes a while to leave.

Upstairs is nice in terms of the view, and its quieter, more private and more secure. A woman alone, would maybe prefer that.
 

Rufous McKinney

Senior Member
Messages
13,251
Would love to hear about others experiences adjusting to stairs of the noise of townhomes or other things. I so miss having a home I could easily live in and the quiet and the freedom.

noise levels are likely tied to how large a complex you might land in. There are 7 units here, so its pretty quiet, and frankly I don' t mind hearing the children downstairs, as at least they are happy and alive.

I do feel like I can't play music loud like I might prefer once and a while. And my daughter would say I can hear you two all the way out in the parking lot. So I wish we had triple pane windows.
 

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
Yes, many things to consider. I'm just so sick and so stressed and worn out. Townhomes do offer more for your money and I could afford one. This is all too much for me. Trying to sort of where to live and so much to worry about and consider.


There is one place that I'm not sure if still availible with an elevator. I thought, that could work. But, i have a feeling they just didn't take it off the website. Fingers crossed.
 

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
There is another one that might have a kinda bachelor room on the bottom? so I could have some kitchen and bed down there to do laundry. Don't know. Seems that most options for me right now are all not ideal by any means.

I was thinking a townhome would be safer too. Who knows. I sure don't know much of anything anymore except stress and worry. lol I been having terrible anxiety attacks for about three days after looking at a cute home but it's in a nieghborhood that is very different than i am used to and i don't know how safe i would feel there. I did put an offer in. the house was more affordable due to the area and it's size. nieghbors said they have never heard of any problems.
 

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
Thanks for all the imput and info.

So, the townhome is nice enough. It has a working elevator in the unit so you can drive in garage, take elevator up to the main floor or top floor with the bedrooms. With the windows closed, it's quiet. Open you hear traffic as it's near a busy street. The elevator has a phone so if you get stuck you can call someone.

It has alot of room and storage which I like and it feels safe and pretty private. I mean, it's a townhouse so not that private. It would be less expensive and less upkeep and the hoa covers direct tv, water, sewer, trash. I talked to a woman who lived there and she said it's nice, quiet and safe. She says she doesn't like living in a townhome and misses her yard, so i am with her on that one. I miss my home with it's amazing backyard. But that is gone.

I so don't know what to do. I am used to having such quiet, nature, darkness at night and privacy but that is gone. I am feeling a bit desperate to get a place. This one is at least in my old neighborhood, not exactly because my old neighborhood was all homes with huge lots but the same area and zip code. It's close to everything I know.

Another home that has a cute yard and little pool needs another offer by tomorrow, but don't know if I will feel safe just due to some run down homes, lots of cars parked around and there are three registered sex offenders nearby. That freaked me out. There is a woman living alone there now and the neighbor across the street said they have never had any problems and she's been there 26 years. But for me, I would be there alone and i saw one of the sex offenders record and it was very scary. The area is just very different than what I am used to.

I don't know. Nether of these feel like places that could be a real home for me but maybe the townhouse could be a place to maybe recover from all the stress and see where i'm at later? I just don't know what to do anymore and i'm so broken inside i don't know if any thing i do right now will feel right or be the best choice as there are so many unknowns and i'm sooo sick. No place can replace my old home that was so great and that i loved sooo much. The townhome could be easier? Just less upkeep or things to worry about but no yard or quiet with windows open. But a very different life there all inside apartment living. No yard, no birds or nature. The little home has a cute, private backyard but will i enjoy it knowing about the sex offenders? It's scary enough moving anywhere by myself now but with the info. eek. No registered sex offenders near the townhouse. And it would be hard to for someone to know i lived alone there who wasn't a next door neighbor. The townhouse is a gated community too.
 
Messages
312
Location
USA
Hi, @Mouse girl
I live in a townhouse, and the difficulty mostly depends on whom the neighbors are at the moment. Right now, my neighbors are at work most of the day, but when they get home and on weekends I hear them slamming kitchen cupboard doors and drawers a lot, so I very often wear earplugs with headphones, playing white noise. My neighbor on the other side works graveyard shift and sleeps in the daytime, but she likes to play music with deep bass sometimes. My previous neighbors were a family of 5 with a dog, so my current neighbors are a relief.

This townhouse has two stories. The stairs were fine for a few years, but now I'm having to be more strategic and efficient about when I go upstairs or downstairs.

I'm actually happy here, as long as I have my implements for sanity (earplugs, headphones, and fans). If you can get a one-story place, it would be much better.

I get grocery delivery, and my kitty litter is shipped, so I just have to get it off the front porch.
 

andyguitar

Moderator
Messages
6,595
Location
South east England
No yard, no birds or nature.
Hmm sounds a bit dull.
The little home has a cute, private backyard but will i enjoy it knowing about the sex offenders?
Sounds like the sort of thing that would keep you awake at night, also would'nt it make it difficult to sell if you wanted to move in the future? Like @christiankatz has pointed out neigbour noise can be a problem in a townhome. Maybe something more suitable in the right location will turn up in a month or so? A one- story in the right area?
 

Mouse girl

Senior Member
Messages
578
All very good points. Thank you. Well, the thing is, i don't know how much more of this looking i can take. It does me in physicaly, mentally and emotionally. I am so sick and so thin, it's just getting harder and harder. and yes maybe something nice will pop up but will i be able to afford it? houses just keep going up and up and up with soo many people trying to buy the few that come on the market.
 

Rufous McKinney

Senior Member
Messages
13,251
The little home has a cute, private backyard but will i enjoy it knowing about the sex offenders? It's scary enough moving anywhere by myself now but with the info. eek.

That type of thing is unbiquitous. If you think you know who lives down any block, anywhere, think again.

I found out a motel I was staying at when working, was harboring an un harborable offender.

I had a good friend who would not allow her 15 year old son to go 3 blocks to school due to this Offender List.

That's the type of thing, you take reasonable precautions but don't let that run your life. Its just not worth it.