mental exhaustion

[poker43]

I am a third year uni student, i hoped that my health would improve by going to uni, instead it has just caused me stress. I am feeling down because i think what is the point of getting this degree, as i am not well enough to work afterwards, it has also not been a very enjoyable experience thus far.

Currently i am just counting down the days until teaching is over, and that is the only thing that i am looking forward to. I feel mentally fried right now, and am struggling to view my situation in anything but a negative light. It doesn't help that i have got a group project to do, with students who i don't like.

How do i find a way to get through this?

 

[Judee]

I have suspected for a very long time that I also have ADHD along with the ME/CFS. Do you think you may as well?

If so, there might be some natural supplements that help like dopa mucuna or Huperzine A. At least those are a couple I have read about and tried.

The Huperzine A does nothing for me cognitively. The results of the dopa have been sporadic, i.e. works sometimes but not others. I have to take it with a pinch of ginkgo though otherwise I end up feeling like my brain is swollen.

That's the other thing, with ME/CFS. I'm super sensitive so many times can only handle pinches of things.

I also got one good day out of soy lecithin but it was the next day and not the day I took it.

Also if you find any of these work for you, I believe the first two have to be taken on a rotational dosing (something like 4 days on and 3 days off, I think) or you can develop tolerance.

I feel badly for you having to push through like that.

I haven't taken classes for decades. I remember how utterly tiring it was even though I was much younger then. I'm not sure what you have where you are but could you do any of your course work virtually?

So much more is available online now since all this pandemic mess started. Even back when I was taking classes I managed to complete a couple of them by taking them as tele-courses. That was so much easier.

Hope you can figure something out.

***Please, don't take anything mentioned if you are taking medications before checking with your doctor or pharmacist first to make sure there are no interactions.

 

[lenora]

I'm sorry that life is kicking you in the face at the moment. School does take a lot out of us....and it's hard to remember that it's almost a universal truth for most people.

Is this something you're actually planning to do when you finish? If not, then perhaps you'd better see a counselor and find out what other things your credits could be used for. It's difficult for most of us to decide on a course of action, say that this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life (I'm sure of it), etc. Who is sure...there are always questions, aren't there?

If you hate where you are heading, then find the strength to change the outcome....I wouldn't put a lot of thought into your fellow students, because they'll come and go so that's something that will take care of itself.

If you're worn out b/c it's the last semester, then please take that into account. It's important also....and even my grandchildren are dragging their feet and they aren't ill like you are. It just seems so many important decisions hinge on today, don't they? Can you take time off....or do you really have to keep going?

Will you be able to work when finished....and what is your major, anyway? I know that all of us remember the slogging days of trying to get our work behind us and for most of us it was never easy. You simply do your best, have a chat with the counselor and go from there. I wish you well. Yours, Lenora.

 

[Wishful]

i hoped that my health would improve by going to uni,

I think there are very few examples of anyone with ME improving through activity, whether physical or cognitive. There are all too many of us who regret not cutting activities to the bare essentials. That's just an unpleasant fact of ME. Other diseases have plenty of examples of people who have overcome major disabilities through hard work, but that just doesn't work for ME.

If you're young and have a talent that can provide a good income if it's trained properly, getting that training (online might be easier if possible) might be worthwhile, if your ME is mild enough to allow you to work at that career. You'll have to judge the possibility of being able to work. You'll also have to judge the risk of making your ME worse by trying too hard. You might also want to check into the possibilities of living on social assistance. Living on minimal income might be better than having a lucrative career option while being bedridden long-term due to overexertion. You also have to judge the possibility of someone finding a treatment or cure for ME at some point: will it come in time to pursue a career? Lots to consider.

 

[hapl808]

I managed to pace myself enough to be relatively successful for my first 15 years of ME/CFS. It was a struggle with some ups and downs and crashes and frustrations. I could've paced myself better and probably been more successful and less miserable trying to push through. But as Wishful said, pushing through often leads to bad outcomes and about five years ago I pushed through some injuries, allergic reactions, etc, and now am completely unable to work anymore.

I guess I don't have a lot to offer other than the understanding of how incredibly frustrating and unfair that all feels.

 

[Rufous McKinney]

I had decades of mild, and could work...but the last several years contributed to the end result of Much Worse Now. Pushing the last few years when I got "worse" was a bad plan.

Agree with Wishful that only you can judge how much is feasible and how badly might you be punished for pushing harder....

I did a type of pacing...didn't think of it that way but I limited trips out to meetings, as those seemed to be much more exhausting- the long drives on freeways. I was able to manage my own schedule and just doing work on the computer didn't;t wipe me out too badly...(now it does)....sometimes I hiked up some mountain for eight hours...now reaching the car outside downstairs is "iffy"....

 

[Wishful]

I wonder how many, if any, people here would say that continuing education or careers despite ME proved to be a good decision.

A useful resource might be a list of education paths and work that people with mild ME have found tolerable (not worsening ME significantly). I expect it would be a 'works for some but not all' just like treatments, but it might at least give people some options to consider.

 

[hapl808]

I wonder how many, if any, people here would say that continuing education or careers despite ME proved to be a good decision.

A useful resource might be a list of education paths and work that people with mild ME have found tolerable (not worsening ME significantly). I expect it would be a 'works for some but not all' just like treatments, but it might at least give people some options to consider.

I enjoyed my career a lot while I was able to continue it. Those 15 years were a huge struggle, but I'm not sure I would've given it up entirely in exchange for maybe a few more years of functioning? It's impossible to say. Many of my severe crashes had more to do with pushing through injuries and allergies and some relationships, not my career. Though I was self-employed so I was able to adjust my work schedule more than most people.

Anyways, no good answers I guess. We're all just looking for the least bad answers.

 

[Rufous McKinney]

A useful resource might be a list of education paths and work that people with mild ME have found tolerable (not worsening ME significantly). I expect it would be a 'works for some but not all' just like treatments, but it might at least give people some options to consider.

I was collapsing physically- (like a down feather being tossed about in a vacant lot by some tiny breeze)....

while doing intense mental work/ PhD level hard work doing science based gnarly stuff...And I was able to keep doing the mental....

and now I"m not.

 

[L'engle]

B12 might help if you haven't tried it. Might get you through the worst of it then you can decide about continuing. It's hard to gauge how much is too much though. It doesn't sound like you are too into what you are studying? School is hard enough for healthy people and for us every bit is hard-won. If you don't like your field of study enough for it to be of interest in itself the constant energy drain might not feel worth it.

 

[Insomniac]

Is it your third and final year?
Your message brought back memories from many years ago when I got ill but pushed through my A- levels and worsened myself.
As a 17 year year old with parents who were pushing me academically and with no one believing in CFIDS/ME, I had no choice and continued and regretted it.

I am feeling down because i think what is the point of getting this degree, as i am not well enough to work afterwards, it has also not been a very enjoyable experience thus far.

Currently i am just counting down the days until teaching is over, and that is the only thing that i am looking forward to. I feel mentally fried right now, and am struggling to view my situation in anything but a negative light. It doesn't help that i have got a group project to do, with students who i don't like.

How do i find a way to get through this?

Is there only a bit to do before finishing?
How long have you left and do you think you can get through it?
Like everyone here said, only you can decide.

If it is only something small then you might as well persevere but if it more, then maybe you need to give up, have a good long rest. Then start thinking about another profession that will be less difficult healthwise. It is extremely upsetting after all the effort in the degree, but not the end of the world.

A lot of us have been there. Having to give up things and do something different.