This morning I got to try the sarcosine at a very small dose, it turns out I am one of the super responders to it but I didn't quite like the way it made me feel. It definitely took my dopamine levels down a bit and made my crave stimulation but in a way the fact I can feel that for me is a plus. I had a slight amount more of vocal fluidity in the morning and later on the rebound it just got worse. I felt irritated and a bit rage-y. After work I just wanted to sit in my room and focus on myself. Largely it was because the supplement cut down my speedy feelings and didn't give me anything in return while I still was in PEM anyways. All in all an uncomfortable experience I don't really know what to make of. Tonight I had some rice and veggies with soy sauce as I wanted to see in this state what would happen if I pushed glutamate higher but that didn't do much. I also listened to more music than I should have tonight which isn't helping how I feel. Just a night stuck in PEM again after another failed science experiment. I have work in the morning too, this garbage never ends. I don't know what this body is running on right now besides pure rage, the drive to live simply to spite the current conditions. I want to do so much more but every week I find myself continually caught in a wave of health bs I barely have any control over. I can force myself to physically work like zombie or I can sit here spacing out not even able to focus on watching something properly feeling like I'm just getting over the worst flu on earth. I have too much to live for, for this joke.