striving to enter into rest
- Thread starter Jody
- Start date
While I'm not familiar with the quote, I'm real familiar with the concept. Someone (of course I can't remember who) has a signature that says something like, "My chronic illness led me to turn chronically to God which led to a chronic connection with God's love." I'm not a Christian, but I can translate that for me and it makes a lot of sense. With CFS, we are almost forced into this kind of communion, almost forced to be contemplatives - only most of us feel we didn't make this choice, which is why the "striving". I really do feel that we and those like us might be on the cutting edge of how humans live in the world. I mean, imagine if world (or even provincial) leaders took time every day to rest and deeply enter their bodies to connect with spirit. Wouldn't it be a different place?
Sorry if this is kind of running in several directions, here.
Sorry if this is kind of running in several directions, here.
Thats very true, Jody. I dont think any of us at the outset really understood how much this disease was going to affect us in ways other than the physical.
Once I realised that I wasnt going to get 'cured' and return to the full normality of good health I had once enjoyed, I found the adjustment very hard.
There were resentments and plenty of 'Why Me ?' moments before I began to adjust to a more contemplative way of life, which was in direct contrast to the life I had been leading before.
I now had more time to study the Bible but funnily enough I studied even less, probably due to fatigue (or so I told myself). What I was really doing was chasing up every new piece of possible information on CFS, going all over the place mentally and exhausting myself even more.:ashamed:
Eventually I was forced to slow down,start opening the Bible again and seek a more spritual existence. I knew that there was not going to be a materia medica answer to CFS in the near future and so sought God for the 'magic bullet cure' prayer like some "name it and claim it " Christians advise people to do.
When that didnt work I went to a Benny Hinn rally, surely I would find healing there. Nope.
Next it was a Derek Prince Weekend seminar on Deliverance. Perhaps I needed a few demons to be cast out and that would do the trick. Nope.:Retro mad:
Finally I gave in and decided I would just read the Bible not expecting anything and just hang out with God. This proved to be the answer for me and now I just to hear passages such as Isiah 30:5 and it seems to help me find the peace and rest I need.
For thus said the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, "In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.
or Isiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
I found I had to "let go,and let God " before I could find his rest. Its not always easy, especially after doing something stupid like overdoing it and crashing (again).:innocent1:
Why didnt I do this from the beginning instead of trailing around wasting time and energy?
Because I'm stupid and wilful and want to do things my way, instead of God's way.:ashamed:
All this reminds me of a story about a little 4 year old girl sat in church with her mother.
The Preacher got up and said in a loud voice " My sermon today is on the theme from the Book of Isiah, Be Still and know that I am God""
"Mummy, is that man really God?" the little girl piped up. "No Dear" the mother replied "He just thinks he is":Retro smile:
.
Once I realised that I wasnt going to get 'cured' and return to the full normality of good health I had once enjoyed, I found the adjustment very hard.
There were resentments and plenty of 'Why Me ?' moments before I began to adjust to a more contemplative way of life, which was in direct contrast to the life I had been leading before.
I now had more time to study the Bible but funnily enough I studied even less, probably due to fatigue (or so I told myself). What I was really doing was chasing up every new piece of possible information on CFS, going all over the place mentally and exhausting myself even more.:ashamed:
Eventually I was forced to slow down,start opening the Bible again and seek a more spritual existence. I knew that there was not going to be a materia medica answer to CFS in the near future and so sought God for the 'magic bullet cure' prayer like some "name it and claim it " Christians advise people to do.
When that didnt work I went to a Benny Hinn rally, surely I would find healing there. Nope.
Next it was a Derek Prince Weekend seminar on Deliverance. Perhaps I needed a few demons to be cast out and that would do the trick. Nope.:Retro mad:
Finally I gave in and decided I would just read the Bible not expecting anything and just hang out with God. This proved to be the answer for me and now I just to hear passages such as Isiah 30:5 and it seems to help me find the peace and rest I need.
For thus said the Lord GOD, the Holy One of Israel, "In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength.
or Isiah 40:31
But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
I found I had to "let go,and let God " before I could find his rest. Its not always easy, especially after doing something stupid like overdoing it and crashing (again).:innocent1:
Why didnt I do this from the beginning instead of trailing around wasting time and energy?
Because I'm stupid and wilful and want to do things my way, instead of God's way.:ashamed:
All this reminds me of a story about a little 4 year old girl sat in church with her mother.
The Preacher got up and said in a loud voice " My sermon today is on the theme from the Book of Isiah, Be Still and know that I am God""
"Mummy, is that man really God?" the little girl piped up. "No Dear" the mother replied "He just thinks he is":Retro smile:
.
Wow, someone is quoting me : ) I have always collected quotes, so that's kind of neat....and the reason I wrote that in my sig file is both to try to remind myself that some good has come out of this illness and to also try to maybe inspire others a little bit - so it's cool to know that you get it, even though you are not coming from a Christian perspective
also interesting thought re world leaders.....too bad they can't get some of your wisdom
also interesting thought re world leaders.....too bad they can't get some of your wisdom
I love the image created by what you said about just hanging out with God........how wonderful!
Sometimes it is really hard to just relax and spend time with Him, but it is so neat when we can do that. I do know that in the last yr my brain fog has worsened, and as a result it has become mroe difficult for me to focus for any length of time at all on reading the Bible.....and sometimes I just want to rest, too (well actually most of the time I am so exhasuted i just want to rest), but I also know that when I put in the effort to read the Bible it does really make a difference in every aspect of my life
oh, and I have one of the verses you mentioned, Isa 40:31, tattooed on my ankle.....when I got it I was thinking of how it had helped me get through running marathons; now running is out, but I look at it and think about running in heaven some day....and walking without fainitng, and soaring, and simply not being tired - what an awesome thing to look forward to!
Sometimes it is really hard to just relax and spend time with Him, but it is so neat when we can do that. I do know that in the last yr my brain fog has worsened, and as a result it has become mroe difficult for me to focus for any length of time at all on reading the Bible.....and sometimes I just want to rest, too (well actually most of the time I am so exhasuted i just want to rest), but I also know that when I put in the effort to read the Bible it does really make a difference in every aspect of my life
oh, and I have one of the verses you mentioned, Isa 40:31, tattooed on my ankle.....when I got it I was thinking of how it had helped me get through running marathons; now running is out, but I look at it and think about running in heaven some day....and walking without fainitng, and soaring, and simply not being tired - what an awesome thing to look forward to!
I have a book called, Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World. It's about slowing down and spending time with God, rather than always focusing on getting things done. I got it before getting sick, when I was living a very busy life, and I never did find the time (how ironic!
) to finish reading it.
Anyway, though it is more intended to address people who are living busy lives, I think it may just be pertinent to the necessary slowing down that this illness demands. I think I will have to pull it out again.
Oh, and the author is Joanna Weaver, in case anyone else wants to look for it.
) to finish reading it.Anyway, though it is more intended to address people who are living busy lives, I think it may just be pertinent to the necessary slowing down that this illness demands. I think I will have to pull it out again.
Oh, and the author is Joanna Weaver, in case anyone else wants to look for it.