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Religious OCD

Messages
21
I am wondering if anyone has experienced this it's called "scruplosity" (spelling)
I am experiencing very bad mental problems involving my faith at the moment. I don't know what is wrong with me but I believe it's related to my mental health. One second loving God, being obsessed, not being interested..bla bla bla I don't know what to do. I don't feel like I love God. I'm all over the place spiritually. I do pray every day. But feel as if I'm two different people God believer/don't believe in God and maybe more. It's been crazy the past month with my health issues.
 
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cmt12

Senior Member
Messages
166
The fact that you are fully symptomatic and interested in spirituality does not surprise me. I've been where you are. You can look through some of my older posts regarding the connection between ME/CFS symptoms and spiritual development.
 

rosie26

Senior Member
Messages
2,446
Location
NZ
I am wondering if anyone has experienced this it's called "scruplosity" (spelling)
I am experiencing very bad mental problems involving my faith at the moment. I don't know what iss wrong with me but I believe it's related to my mental health. One second loving God, being obsessed, not being interested..bla bla bla I don't know what to do. I don't feel like I love God. I'm all over the place spiritually. I do pray every day. But feel as if I'm two different people God believer/don't believe in God and maybe more. It's been crazy the past month with my health issues.
It sounds like you need to rest. Just rest your body and mind. Your mind sounds too active and it's getting caught up and tangled. Which is not helpful in seeing things more calmly. Is this how it feels for you?
 
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Messages
21
It sounds like you need to rest. Just rest your body and mind. Your mind sounds too active and it's getting caught up and tangled. Which is not helpful in seeing things more calmly. Is this how it feels for you?
Yes. For about two weeks I was insanely OCD. I remember one night I was tossing and turning from the thoughts and compulsions that everything I did was wrong. I was fighting it and it was only relieved when I did the thing in question (brush my teeth..). I started taking lorazepam which has helped that and haven't had it since but still don't feel spiritually "well". :(
 
Messages
21
The fact that you are fully symptomatic and interested in spirituality does not surprise me. I've been where you are. You can look through some of my older posts regarding the connection between ME/CFS symptoms and spiritual development.
What does fully symptomatic mean? Many symptoms? I'll look through your posts now.
 

cmt12

Senior Member
Messages
166
It sounds like you need to rest. Just rest your body and mind. Your mind sounds too active and it's getting caught up and tangled. Which is not helpful in seeing things more calmly. Is this how it feels for you?
This is the best advice right now. Try to find and hold onto something quiet and still within you. The pain will subside over time.
 

Sea

Senior Member
Messages
1,286
Location
NSW Australia
It's hard to sort out what you believe when your mind is not working properly and playing tricks on you. It is very common, whether people have a faith or not, for there to be some sort of spiritual focus for OCD, delusions and guilt. I'd take it as an indication you need treatment rather than anything to do with your faith. Be gentle with yourself
 

PNR2008

Senior Member
Messages
613
Location
OH USA
There is a condition called religiosity and also times when madness can seem like a religious breakthrough. Most mystics had mentors to keep them grounded and sane. Saints and Madmen by Russell Shorto is a coming together of Psychiatry and Religion. Many times the " insanity" can be helped by drugs and talk therapy with a psychiatrist or psychologist with a background in religious studies.

Many mental health illnesses can help a person become overly religious but some truly religious experiences are exactly that. Persons affected must learn to deal with either scenario. Scrupulosity can many times have OCD behaviors.

I think it's best to find a health professional that is not afraid to talk about God and religion. CFS/ME can be enough of a burden without feeling guilt over a subject that is meant to help us.
 

Skippa

Anti-BS
Messages
841
I was talking to a psychologist years ago and I said I get anxious when walking into a busy bar.

He said "perhaps you just don't like bars".

Instead of causing yourself mental anguish maybe you could just stop focusing on God for a while. Make a deal with yourself to simply pray once a day, and then get on with life, get on with your immediate problems.

If you decide to come back, he'll still be there :)
 

JES

Senior Member
Messages
1,318
Unless you get a net positive impact on your life from religion, my advice would be not engage in it at all. I have no problem with people being religious if they feel it adds value to their life (and of course some people so strongly believe that they would never turn away from it regardless of what happened). But religion can lead to so many issues as well, so it's not at all strange to have doubts. Put the thing aside for a bit and see if your life will get any better.

One thing I would recommend instead is mindfulness, it's a much more practical approach to anxiety and issues like that. It did help me a lot.
 
Messages
58
Location
Midatlantic US
I've definitely dealt with that. I would apologize repetitively to God in my head, never feeling forgiven. It was not fun at all.

But know that this isn't the real you. Your OCD and your true spirituality/relationship with God are separate things. OCD is an illness and God does not condemn those with illness, but has compassion towards them. :hug: :thumbsup:
 

caledonia

Senior Member
I am wondering if anyone has experienced this it's called "scruplosity" (spelling)
I am experiencing very bad mental problems involving my faith at the moment. I don't know what is wrong with me but I believe it's related to my mental health. One second loving God, being obsessed, not being interested..bla bla bla I don't know what to do. I don't feel like I love God. I'm all over the place spiritually. I do pray every day. But feel as if I'm two different people God believer/don't believe in God and maybe more. It's been crazy the past month with my health issues.

Yes. For about two weeks I was insanely OCD. I remember one night I was tossing and turning from the thoughts and compulsions that everything I did was wrong. I was fighting it and it was only relieved when I did the thing in question (brush my teeth..). I started taking lorazepam which has helped that and haven't had it since but still don't feel spiritually "well". :(

Yes, my dad had this exact same thing. For him it was a symptom of OCD. You can have either OCD which is just anxiety provoking thoughts, or OCD in which the thoughts are relieved by actions.

For example, the classic OCD thing is to be afraid of germs, which is relieved by repetitive hand washing.

I've also had OCD thoughts in which I would get intrusive scary thoughts about death. I still get them from time to time but they're mild and I've learned to manage them. The main thing is to not take them seriously. Then redirect your attention to something else.

If it continues and is very bothersome, I would suggest finding a therapist who specializes in OCD. I've done this and it was very helpful.

The other thing is you might be low in serotonin. 5htp works well for me. One in the evening is sufficient if I'm having extra trouble.

As far as if you have to go on a medication, the usual thing is to prescribe an SSRI and possibly also a benzodiazepam. I've been on these. They're both very addictive and have numerous sided effects. My suggestion would be to avoid these if possible, but if you have no other choice, try them. Nowadays, there is now a gene test you can take to see which psych medications you can tolerate before you take them, so look for that. It would no doubt save you a lot of trouble and expense trying out medications.

I had a horrendous withdrawal syndrome trying to come off Zoloft too fast which triggered my OCD. That lasted the better part of a year. I call it my "lost year".

I'm now 3 years in to a very slow 5 year taper off Zoloft, which shows you how addictive and hard it can be to get off SSRIs for some people. Doctors don't tell you this. For a benzo figure at least 6 months to get back off. For some sensitive people, it might be years. I think most people just stay on them for life.

If you're already on an SSRI or SNRI, it might be "pooping out" and that can cause withdrawal symptoms which includes OCD.

Benzos can cause rebound anxiety as they wear out of your system. If you're on these, you might need to switch to a longer acting variety and/or take them more often to keep the level of medication at an even keel.