I personally have come to understand your sense of humor and sarcasm, and your metaphorical and whimsical wordings,
@Howard
and it's a good style, for expressing yourself, and for social interaction.
Yet, I suggest that even here, on this thread, which is on subject of your illness and disability,
that you call that item, you mentioned, not by anything but what it truly is:
It IS your " reminder list " ...
of things you want yourself to remember to tell the judge,
in order to inform the judge , how limited your daily life is, due to the severity of your condition.
It IS one of the " tools "
that you use,
and most all of us, and many ill and disabled people, must rely on, in order to function the best we are able.
These reminder lists/tools, are things you (we) did not need, before we were ill, but we need now. For any task, including the difficult one of interacting with others and communicating, with anyone, including a judge. Answering questions, must be prepared for in advance or you would likely forget important true facts, and pertinent ones to that setting. The info most important to the judge.
I know what you mean, yet when explaining to ANY other people,
I would stick with simple, clear and honest, straightforward language and wordings, for this topic and this situation. …
In addition, remember to plan to Answer the questions a judge poses, truthfully, and more fully than yes or no if possible (while sticking to the question and to how it impacts daily activities and work)
While being totally honest with the judge, DO not sugar-coat, as we were all taught to do in order to act like polite, considerate people.
Example: "Do you feed yourself?"
I need 100% help from another person in order to prepare my meals and all my drinks and foods, and to put them near me. Then I can feed myself.... (possibly your specific ways you do)
Because... (whatever your reasons are) …. I cannot sit up, or cannot sit up long enough, to do preparations of ANY foods or meals, even simple ones. Or, whatever is the case. Perhaps you prepare something VERY simple, like a sandwich, if the items are all ready and in reach, or perhaps you open a container of soup that is all prepared...etc.
You might add, additional truthful facts that directly relate to the task, such as:
I don't like requiring help for this, but my mobility is extremely minimal, and..... whatever other symptoms you get, including pain, when you go past those limits.
Such as, in a task like bathing or washing, as you have said, when you washed your own face and part of yourself, you were totally wiped out afterwards, and could move less and were in more pain.
These are your "things to remember" and they are not, anything else, so it's best to call them what they are. I believe it is important , on the topic of disability and hearings, that you not use colorful language that could possibly falsely mislead anyone. This is a time for you to stick up for yourself, in a clear, simple honest way.
And not joke about how to prepare, in ways that someone else might not get the joke. Even here, on a forum.
Just my ideas, as I am trying to be helpful.