(warning strong language) I used the word EXTREME in all caps for a reason.
I'm diagnosed with me/cfs, POTS, i have 14 bmi, inflammation in the gut/stomach and a bunch of other stuff.
I have reduced emotions but after seeing 2 psychiatrists i wasn't diagnosed with depression, i don't have any psychosis and the anxiety i have is pretty low considering my situation(stuck with abusive parents who won't let me see doctors because "it's all bullshit", i reached out to associations social services etc nothing can be done). I would be generally considered mentally healthy if it wasnt for.... EXTREME adhd.
It's absolute fucking insanity. It's worse than anything i've ever thought possible, its the exact opposite of the concept of free will. It's literally at the point where i type 5 words and i have to walk back and forth for 2 minutes(which speaks volumes considering i'm homebound with me/cfs..............). It's at the point where i spend 10 hours, the ENTIRE DAY trying to psych up just to be able to "concentrate" for 5 minutes.
It's absurd how much this ADHD ruins my quality of life. My me/cfs ruins it by about 97%, but i would have a solid 3% to work with. I'm homebound but i would have enough mental energy to do something with my life (maybe try to earn money online etc). But the adhd ruins it by 99.999999999999999%. I'm literally unable to do anything at all because of it.
I didn't have this when i was little. It started about 2 years ago (i'm 22 now) so i wouldn't even fit the criteria for ADHD. They will just tell me it's a psychological problem (since doesnt fit into a box = psychological), more so because the country where i live (Italy) has a strong bias against adhd. All stimulants are illegal here except for Ritalin, which is given ONLY to kids with adhd (not adults) who have to be evaluated by many state psychiatrists and put on a national adhd registry(meanwhile benzos given out like candy, YEY POLITICS). Psychiatrists here would rather diagnose you with "psychosomatic syndrome" and tell you your attention problems are part of it than to diagnose with adhd. The treatment? Antipsychotics, which i've tried and only make me worse. Or otherwise psychotherapy.
I've tried everything. I write everything down (which is useless because no matter how organized i try to make things i can't read what i wrote down), i tried literally anything and everything. 2 years ago it was really bad but i forced myself, i have great willpower. 6 months ago i forced myself harder than anyone has ever done, literally having to try harder than fucking super saiyan goku to be able to write down a mail. Now, it's like if you asked me if i would rather write a mail or climb mt everest i would choose the latter, i'm 100% serious. I have no semblance of free will left and it sucks ass. And it keeps getting worse.
Tomorrow i'm going to my new GP and i absolutely CRINGE at the thought of him saying "try writing stuff down" or telling me to do psychotherapy because it will not help in any way shape or form whatsoever, there is not a single chance. I've gone to many neurologists and explained this problem to all of them and nobody seems to fucking take it seriously. They just say "yeah cognitive problems part of cfs blah blah". I can't get a stimulant anywhere. I asked modafinil (which isn't even a real stimulant) to 10 different doctors and all of them said no.
I don't know what to do. I'm at the point where i can't even reach out to anyone because the moment i try to look someone up or message them i instantly get distracted and overwhelmed by everything. I can't even go to doctors because my parents won't let me.
Honestly at this point just tell me the supplement that is the most likely to help out with this and i'll use the last bit of my non existant attention span to order it on amazon.
I'm diagnosed with me/cfs, POTS, i have 14 bmi, inflammation in the gut/stomach and a bunch of other stuff.
I have reduced emotions but after seeing 2 psychiatrists i wasn't diagnosed with depression, i don't have any psychosis and the anxiety i have is pretty low considering my situation(stuck with abusive parents who won't let me see doctors because "it's all bullshit", i reached out to associations social services etc nothing can be done). I would be generally considered mentally healthy if it wasnt for.... EXTREME adhd.
It's absolute fucking insanity. It's worse than anything i've ever thought possible, its the exact opposite of the concept of free will. It's literally at the point where i type 5 words and i have to walk back and forth for 2 minutes(which speaks volumes considering i'm homebound with me/cfs..............). It's at the point where i spend 10 hours, the ENTIRE DAY trying to psych up just to be able to "concentrate" for 5 minutes.
It's absurd how much this ADHD ruins my quality of life. My me/cfs ruins it by about 97%, but i would have a solid 3% to work with. I'm homebound but i would have enough mental energy to do something with my life (maybe try to earn money online etc). But the adhd ruins it by 99.999999999999999%. I'm literally unable to do anything at all because of it.
I didn't have this when i was little. It started about 2 years ago (i'm 22 now) so i wouldn't even fit the criteria for ADHD. They will just tell me it's a psychological problem (since doesnt fit into a box = psychological), more so because the country where i live (Italy) has a strong bias against adhd. All stimulants are illegal here except for Ritalin, which is given ONLY to kids with adhd (not adults) who have to be evaluated by many state psychiatrists and put on a national adhd registry(meanwhile benzos given out like candy, YEY POLITICS). Psychiatrists here would rather diagnose you with "psychosomatic syndrome" and tell you your attention problems are part of it than to diagnose with adhd. The treatment? Antipsychotics, which i've tried and only make me worse. Or otherwise psychotherapy.
I've tried everything. I write everything down (which is useless because no matter how organized i try to make things i can't read what i wrote down), i tried literally anything and everything. 2 years ago it was really bad but i forced myself, i have great willpower. 6 months ago i forced myself harder than anyone has ever done, literally having to try harder than fucking super saiyan goku to be able to write down a mail. Now, it's like if you asked me if i would rather write a mail or climb mt everest i would choose the latter, i'm 100% serious. I have no semblance of free will left and it sucks ass. And it keeps getting worse.
Tomorrow i'm going to my new GP and i absolutely CRINGE at the thought of him saying "try writing stuff down" or telling me to do psychotherapy because it will not help in any way shape or form whatsoever, there is not a single chance. I've gone to many neurologists and explained this problem to all of them and nobody seems to fucking take it seriously. They just say "yeah cognitive problems part of cfs blah blah". I can't get a stimulant anywhere. I asked modafinil (which isn't even a real stimulant) to 10 different doctors and all of them said no.
I don't know what to do. I'm at the point where i can't even reach out to anyone because the moment i try to look someone up or message them i instantly get distracted and overwhelmed by everything. I can't even go to doctors because my parents won't let me.
Honestly at this point just tell me the supplement that is the most likely to help out with this and i'll use the last bit of my non existant attention span to order it on amazon.