Since I wrote this I've mostly got the HRT problems straigenthed out. The issue is that too little HRT and I have unpleasnat and painful meno symptoms, but too much HRT and I have MCAS symptoms. My gyn and MCAS doc have both confirmed this for me too. The trick is to find a gyn that has heard of mast cells. I don't have any good advice for this- I just kept trying new ones until I found one that was helpful, mostly by reading online reviews.
For exmple, both meno and MCAS will cause muscle pain, but t feels a bit different. I adjusted doses of HRT to try to split the difference. But the real key for me is getting the MCAS better controlled. It's not right now- can't spell, but that's helpd a lot.