Guardianship Order

[jesse's mom]

Bless! You are overwhelmed! I really hope the hospital gets someone over to get your house in order.

I have a friend who has no one left. He had a massive stroke, and I was helping him for years until I became bedridden. My husband helps him, but not like I did... so sad!

I wish I could blink my eyes and be there to get this going for you. From the other side of the world.

You do need more help and I am thinking of you daily.

I cannot comment on what you should do because I am in the US and don't have a clue how those laws work.

Just wanted you to know I hear you and I care.

 

[YippeeKi YOW !!]

The other kind of guardian - and I know this for sure, I was working with this as a small part time job once upon a time- help the client to pay their bills, or contact the bank or... - but you have absolutely no authority otherwise. The client decide, you make it happen. You have access to their accounts, so if you are a villain you can drain it, of course. But you are not allowed to, and will be put to jail if you do.

@Hufsamor

Norway is an extremely sensible and advanced country in this area.

That's as close to a perfect system as I think you can get. Unfortunately, the sensible second part I quoted above isn't available, or at least wasn't several years ago, here in the US under gov't programs, only as a privately hired and paid service . It's all or nothing.

With a privat person you really don't know, .....

There are legal constraints in our justice system. Additionally, they have to be licensed by the state, and bonded. It's as sure a bet as turning your life over to someone whose politician uncle got him the job and will fight to protect him, and their own reputation, from any claims you bring legally. A risk, but no more so than the gov't conservatorship way.

 

[YippeeKi YOW !!]

@taniaaust1

The hospital dr was good and he tried to arrange temporary accommodation for me till the bullshit with services is sorted and my house can be cleaned and livable again... but unfortunately due to the MCS, we can not put me into temporary accommodation as the place was shared. Er doctor also tried to reach my case worker who has failed to put my supports in place but he was unable to reach her (AGAIN.. hospital tries everytime I end up there and get a good dr).

Oh, tania, this is just awful. Truly, truly awful. And I feel completely helpless.

It's appalling that your case manager has been allowed to screw up so thoroughly, so completely and so constantly, and it really makes me worry even more about a guardianship. Case workers are, essentially, an informal guardian, assigned to you to help you avoid exactly these sorts of circumstances. This miserable excuse for a human being should NEVER have been allowed to take their appalling incompetence this far, where is the effing oversight.

things are a mess .. a big mess.. everything is mess and I cant cope

How could you cope right now? That's what your case worker should have ben helping avoid. Oh, tania, my heart goes out to you. This is soooooo way much more stress than you can handle right now, or should have to handle, ever.

I have NOONE who understands severe ME/CFS working with me (I do not even have a dr anymore or ME/CFS specialist)... I'm now on last resorts).

I swear to you, something good is going to come of all this. There's some little miracle coming at you, there just has to be. Please try to focus on that, and believe it. I know it seems like a pipe-dream, I know that everything seems hopelessly balled-up right now, but I've seen it happen to others and to myself.

But things should not be getting to this state in the first place, which they are as my support case manager sucks and does not organise anything and I have not managed to sort things myself (I end up going around in circles when I try due to my memory issues. My brain is having trouble retaining info).. (and that is just one of all the urgent issues I have right now, issues I'm needing help in sorting).

I totally, completely, hear you on the brain thing. WHen I was at my extreme worst, even the smallest decision, the smallest challenge, the tiniest issue, would put my brain into spin cycle, going around and around, faster and faster, and trying desperately to find the priority, to grasp the method, the way. It was impossible to do.

I'm sending you ferocious prayers and hope. I wish I could send you an honest, kind, committed guardian, like @Hufsamor. They do exist.

 

[YippeeKi YOW !!]

@taniaaust1

someone to step in when Im really running into issues and just to check that bills get paid or that I dont end up paying things twice (that was something I also was doing).

ANd to keep a tight eye on your, I hope, new case worker. Firm direction from someone, anyone, they can't just dance away from would do wonders in terms of your other ongoing care needs. Maybe your sister if she can handle that, maybe an atty that you hire to oversee and control stuff like this.

Im worried about getting someone like off the street to do that as they would have access to things like my bank account..

I have no idea how it works in Australia, but here, they have to apply for a state license, they have to be bonded against claims by clients so they can't default on restitution. THey really have some strict oversight, they're not just '.... someone off the street ...". WHich is not say that it's foolproof, but if you have a business that has to be state licensed, and you start racking up complaints, you'll lose your business far more quickly that you'd ever be fird from a gov't position.

But that's how it works here, I have no idea how it would work there.

So at times I've looked at that and freaked, not knowing what is going on with my account... thinking I've been robbed when there is nothing bad actually going on at all. (with my memory issues and inability to remember what I'm spent money on and what I have and have not paid, its too much for me).

This is a terrifying place to be, tania. There's help out there somewhere, and you'll find it. Or it will find you. FOr all you know, the Dr who tried in vain to each your case manager may already have put some wheels in motion, and good news may arrive sooner than you think.

I'm praying for that. I send you love and hugs, for whatever that's worth.

 

[taniaaust1]

I'm really sorry for all your troubles.
I can't believe it has gone so far for you.
And I do understand you really need a partly guardian.
it will be such a relief for you when you get one.

I hope thing will be sorted out for you,
all the things you need.
Please keep us updated

Im actually worried that I may be in early stages of dementia and maybe its not all ME/CFS, but then only my ME/CFS sister has the same kind of issues with her brain too so maybe it is just ME.

On my DNA genetic testing.. it now is saying I have a 60% chance of getting Alzheimer's after the age of 50 (Im 45 now), orginally it said a 40% chance after the age of 50 but they must of updated something and added another gene into the risk factors as it rates me at 60% risk after that age now but I guess my risk would be higher due to lifestyle and not able to exercise which is preventative. My grandmother did not get Alzheimer's till she was in her 80s, so I guess that is a good sign.
..........

Today, Ive started trying to find a ME/CFS specialist and a GP, booked in for a GP once he gets back from holidays in a couple of weeks but unsure how that is going to go.

 

[taniaaust1]

@taniaaust1
THey really have some strict oversight, they're not just '.... someone off the street ...". WHich is not say that it's foolproof, but if you have a business that has to be state licensed, and you start racking up complaints, you'll lose your business far more quickly that you'd ever be fird from a gov't position.

But that's how it works here, I have no idea how it would work there.

Hi, thanks for your posts. I was referring with that statement to someone's suggestion to get a uni student to help me with my finances. (someone who has not gone throu the police checks and whatever else they go through to do that role of handling anothers financial stuff, scares me).

 

[YippeeKi YOW !!]

@taniaaust1

but then only my ME/CFS sister has the same kind of issues with her brain too so maybe it is just ME.

Your symptoms are very ME/CFS-y. And if your sister, who also has ME has the same brain fog symptoms, too, go with the flow. Sufficient unto the day the evil thereof, or dread one day at a time. You hvae plenty on your plate as it is, no need to add more.

it now is saying I have a 60% chance of getting Alzheimer's after the age of 50 (Im 45 now), orginally it said a 40% chance after the age of 50 but they must of updated something as it rates me at 60% risk after that age now.

I won't go into how often genetic testing gets it wrong because I'm not sure of my figures and am too wiped out and somewhat brain-fogged to do a fairly involved search, but it does happen. And the fact that they changed your outlook doesnt mean that they got it any more right the second time. And it doesn't mean that you wont be one of the 40% who won't get dementia.

I know that this is a frightening 'diagnosis', but give yourself a little break. You have enough tough crap to deal with today without adding in tomorrow, too.

I've been told that between my cancer and this nasty little shite of an illness, my life-expectancy could be cut by as much as 20% or more. I say "Ha! We'll see who goes to whose funeral, eh?"

 

[YippeeKi YOW !!]

I was referring with that statement to someone's suggestion to get a uni student to help me with my finances. (someone who has not gone throu the police checks and whatever else they go through to do that role of handling anothers financial stuff, scares me).

@taniaaust1
I know. That was my suggestion. Keep in mind that any skullduggery would destroy their careers before they're out of college (but they'd get to keep their student loans without any visible way to pay them back), so other than dumb errors, they're unlikely, perhaps even more unlikely than gov't workers, to try to pull any stunts at this crucial starting point in their lives.

But if you're uncomfortable with that, just ignore it. Just because someone suggests something to you doesn't mean that you have to follow thru on it, or even give it a second glance.

 

[Hufsamor]

On my DNA genetic testing..

May I ask where, witch site, you use ?
(I've done the test through 23 and me, but where do you get the interpretation?