Long Haul Mono
Senior Member
- Messages
- 122
Having read other posts I'm aware there are those (like me) who find lengthy posts 'taxing on the energy levels' so I'll start with a dot-point brief and read on if interested and if your energy levels allow.
In brief:
...and for those still interested in reading on:
Recently, I had a chance to 'take a step back' and really think about what I'm dealing with right now. At the risk of being accused of having a mid-life crisis, I turned 50 earlier this year, and started to think of the actual cost (to my physical- and potentially over time mental-health). I can't say I'm enjoying life anymore but rather "enduring" it. This is not the first time I found myself here, and I believe things must change, ie I put this off for too long.
At the moment I'm clearing out a fungal infection that apparently 'slipped under the radar' of my (apparently) dysfunctional immune system, ie I have read that most people are exposed to this kind of fungus on an almost-daily basis and can fight it off quite easily, possibly without even consciously being aware.
This is my short-term goal, and then with the help/guidance of my GP, evaluating and refining a sustainable management strategy That is my hope moving forward.
I have written about my employer in other posts so I won't reiterate here. Apart from the 'office politics', I enjoy the challenges this work provides and was able to manage my ME before the abuse began. To date I have not fully recovered from the year-long, sporadically-occurring abuse, and with the likelihood of a recurrence, I think it would be wise to leave ASAP.
The only problem is finding new employment, and the two challenging odds stacked against me: Age discrimination and Disability discrimination, both of which are prevalent in Australia.
Leaving this job may result in long-term financial problems, and although I am "closer" to retirement age I still don't have enough to retire early.
I think I also covered the building non-compliance of my townhouse in another thread. Having tried my best to resolve this the matter is hopeless and it's basically time to sell up and move, which is kind of heartbreaking as I just paid off the mortgage a few years ago and am not looking to get back into debt.
Dealing with ME is enough of a task as many of you would agree. However when you add the following (which I'm currently dealing with):
- Toxic workplace and the increasing number of "signs" suggesting I may be "managed out the door" soon/eventually. My employer has shown they care little for CFS/ME.
- A house where I can't really get rest. The percussive noise occurs anytime 24/7
- COVID and the looming threat of Government vaccine mandates (a different topic I won't cover here)
- Knowing I don't currently have the energy/stamina to make this "sea change".
- Knowing I can't remain in this "status quo". I think the old song "Should I stay or should I go now" by the Clash is fitting here.
I'm well aware, when a person is 'drowning in a bad issue' it may be difficult to think clearly or come up with ideas to initiate the necessary actions, which is why I'm writing this today, with the hope someone may provide feedback that I can use as a start point.
I am also well aware this is not a quick fix and will take time, which is why I am pre-emptively (job-wise) acting now.
The local CFS/ME support groups seem limited in what they could offer me and, although there is the Centrelink (unemployment/disability pension) catch-net, I don't want that to be the first go-to option. Unemployment benefits or a disability pension are not sustainable incomes.
My hope in moving away from here is to a cheaper area where I'd burn through my income slower. Sounds like wishful thinking? well... all thoughts/ideas are on the table right now.
Thanks for reading and I look forward to your constructive comments/suggestions.
In brief:
- I have considered the need for a major life change as part of 'moving forward'/future management of my ME.
- Currently employed with a toxic employer, but due to COVID (for now) work from home, but feel my days are numbered.
- My house provides little opportunity for rest (without earplugs/noise-canceling headphones) due to neighbours/other environmental factors.
- I recently have been "tempted" by YouTube videos of off-grid living, but need to be realistic about my current limitations.
- I feel 'slowing things right down' will help me manage this better, but today's employment/lifestyle demands are at the opposite extreme.
- Has anyone in this forum experienced/actioned a major "sea change"? I'd love to hear from you.
...and for those still interested in reading on:
Recently, I had a chance to 'take a step back' and really think about what I'm dealing with right now. At the risk of being accused of having a mid-life crisis, I turned 50 earlier this year, and started to think of the actual cost (to my physical- and potentially over time mental-health). I can't say I'm enjoying life anymore but rather "enduring" it. This is not the first time I found myself here, and I believe things must change, ie I put this off for too long.
At the moment I'm clearing out a fungal infection that apparently 'slipped under the radar' of my (apparently) dysfunctional immune system, ie I have read that most people are exposed to this kind of fungus on an almost-daily basis and can fight it off quite easily, possibly without even consciously being aware.
This is my short-term goal, and then with the help/guidance of my GP, evaluating and refining a sustainable management strategy That is my hope moving forward.
I have written about my employer in other posts so I won't reiterate here. Apart from the 'office politics', I enjoy the challenges this work provides and was able to manage my ME before the abuse began. To date I have not fully recovered from the year-long, sporadically-occurring abuse, and with the likelihood of a recurrence, I think it would be wise to leave ASAP.
The only problem is finding new employment, and the two challenging odds stacked against me: Age discrimination and Disability discrimination, both of which are prevalent in Australia.
Leaving this job may result in long-term financial problems, and although I am "closer" to retirement age I still don't have enough to retire early.
I think I also covered the building non-compliance of my townhouse in another thread. Having tried my best to resolve this the matter is hopeless and it's basically time to sell up and move, which is kind of heartbreaking as I just paid off the mortgage a few years ago and am not looking to get back into debt.
Dealing with ME is enough of a task as many of you would agree. However when you add the following (which I'm currently dealing with):
- Toxic workplace and the increasing number of "signs" suggesting I may be "managed out the door" soon/eventually. My employer has shown they care little for CFS/ME.
- A house where I can't really get rest. The percussive noise occurs anytime 24/7
- COVID and the looming threat of Government vaccine mandates (a different topic I won't cover here)
- Knowing I don't currently have the energy/stamina to make this "sea change".
- Knowing I can't remain in this "status quo". I think the old song "Should I stay or should I go now" by the Clash is fitting here.
I'm well aware, when a person is 'drowning in a bad issue' it may be difficult to think clearly or come up with ideas to initiate the necessary actions, which is why I'm writing this today, with the hope someone may provide feedback that I can use as a start point.
I am also well aware this is not a quick fix and will take time, which is why I am pre-emptively (job-wise) acting now.
The local CFS/ME support groups seem limited in what they could offer me and, although there is the Centrelink (unemployment/disability pension) catch-net, I don't want that to be the first go-to option. Unemployment benefits or a disability pension are not sustainable incomes.
My hope in moving away from here is to a cheaper area where I'd burn through my income slower. Sounds like wishful thinking? well... all thoughts/ideas are on the table right now.
Thanks for reading and I look forward to your constructive comments/suggestions.
