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Join us for Patrick's Memorial Service (conference call on May 6, 2012)

RivkaRivka

Senior Member
Messages
368
== Feel free to forward ==

April 26, 2012

Dear members of the ME/CFS and Lyme communities,

WHAT: Invitation to Patrick Kelly's Memorial (and Healing) Service, via a telephone conference call.
WHEN: Sunday, May 6, 2012, at 3 pm EST (which is 12 noon PST; 8 pm London time; 7 pm Greenwich Mean Time).
WHO: Anyone in the ME/CFS/Lyme community moved to join us. We'll also welcome Patrick's father and close friends from both on and off the forums.
HOW: Conference Call dial-in to this USA phone number: 1-218-862-1300. Then you must punch in the Conference Code: 840957
RSVP: None required.
COST: No charge to call this phone number, except whatever your own phone service will charge you.
QUESTIONS?: Contact Rivka (at) ThatTakesOvaries (dot) org

DETAILS: Last week we lost a wonderful man, Patrick Kelly (aka "hubcap_halo"), to this horrific illness that so many of us struggle with. Patrick was an amazingly supportive and upbeat man who was constantly striving to move in a positive direction towards health and wellness, along with the rest of us.

We understand how hard Patrick's life must have been, living a decade and a half with ME/CFS/Lyme -- so hard that he finally decided he was better off not struggling any longer. This was a shocking and deep blow to all of us, even if we did not know Patrick personally. As individuals and as a community, it will take us time to grieve and heal.

Please feel free to join us as we begin to do just that at this Memorial (and Healing) Service for Patrick Kelly, where we will fondly remember our much loved community member.

Since you did not need to have known Patrick personally to feel the impact of his loss, you also do not need to have known him personally to now feel welcome to come to his Memorial Service.

During the call, those who wish can share a few minutes of fond memories of Patrick, or perhaps appropriate quotes from Patrick's health forum posts over the years. There is no need to sign up in advance, just come ready to share if you want to.

NOTE: Unfortunately, our gathering will not be able to offer personal counseling services to those who are in need. But we sure understand the need! So we urge you to not give up hope and please seek help. For those feeling like the pain and suffering is unbearable, this is a good place to start: http://www.metanoia.org/suicide/
 

Sushi

Moderation Resource Albuquerque
Messages
19,935
Location
Albuquerque
Thanks RivkaRivka,

This is a great thing to do. We don't want to feel that Patrick just "fell off the globe" without anyone noticing. He and all of us, deserve recognition and honor for the great lives we lead in the face of such incredible obstacles.

I think this is an opportunity to both honor Patrick and ourselves, move along in the grieving process and support each other to prevent others from being added to the "honor roll."

Thanks for organizing this. Just the fact that you did, is another tribute to the kind of people in this community.

Sushi
 

RivkaRivka

Senior Member
Messages
368
Thanks RivkaRivka,

This is a great thing to do. We don't want to feel that Patrick just "fell off the globe" without anyone noticing. He and all of us, deserve recognition and honor for the great lives we lead in the face of such incredible obstacles.

I think this is an opportunity to both honor Patrick and ourselves, move along in the grieving process and support each other to prevent others from being added to the "honor roll."

Thanks for organizing this. Just the fact that you did, is another tribute to the kind of people in this community.

Sushi

sushi, it is people like you that help keep us all alive in the face of this illness. see you on may 6th.
 

Wayne

Senior Member
Messages
4,300
Location
Ashland, Oregon
Rivka,
Thank you - Thank you - Thank you ... :thumbsup:

Patrick has been on my mind a lot these past few days, and I've been been feeling a bit disconcerted about how we all might feel some kind of resolution to his unexpected passing. This feels like just the right thing for him, and for all of us. Thanks to you and everybody who is helping to make this happen. It feels like a most fitting tribute to a unique and wonderful man.

Warmly, Wayne
 

RivkaRivka

Senior Member
Messages
368
wayne, you have been a treasure to our community, too, over the years. i hope you will say a few words at the gathering. -- best, rivka
 

richvank

Senior Member
Messages
2,732
Hi, all.

Just bumping this thread up to remind everyone about the memorial conference call for Patrick today.

Best regards,

Rich
 

Wayne

Senior Member
Messages
4,300
Location
Ashland, Oregon
Just thought I'd mention that I just called in, and found it very easy to connect (I thought it might be too complicated for my brain). Should be starting in another 5-10 minutes or so.
 

Sushi

Moderation Resource Albuquerque
Messages
19,935
Location
Albuquerque
Easy to connect. About 40 people on the call now. Patrick's Dad is now talking.

Sushi
 

Wayne

Senior Member
Messages
4,300
Location
Ashland, Oregon
Unfortunately, the conference call became disconnected around 12:55. It felt like a privilege to part of this Memorial Service. Patrick's father, along with several others, spoke movingly of the love, appreciation and admiration they felt for Patrick. Thanks so much to all who shared.

I had thought of saying a few words as somebody who never got to know him personally. I did however, have one brief cordial exchange with with him on a thread he started on the ProHealth board. It had prompted me to take a look at his BIO, and quickly came to appreciate his unique sense of humor. So I wrote thanking him for the chuckles. He responded by thanking me for reminding him of his sense of humor.

He had also started a thread pointing out how important it is to be supportive of others as they try new and sometimes unconventional therapies to try to get well. One of the comments he made was that he himself "would put on a bear costume and ride a tiny bike down 5th Avenue if I thought it would heal me."

Last year, he started a thread asking for suggestions of a place that might be suitable for him to live, and listed some of the criteria he was looking for. Even though I didn't know him personally, I wrote up a description of where I live here in Ashland, Oregon, and as I wrote, noticed that I was beginning to hope that he would move here!

From all the descriptions I've read, and today heard about Patrick, it seems that he was the kind of person who people wanted to be close to. Or in my case, as somebody who really didn't know him at all, but had a desire to get to know better.

Big thank yous to Patrick's father, Rivka, Marty, Lila, Richvank, Judy Mikovitz, and others who spoke, and even those who participated but didn't have a chance to speak. The music and the poetry was really quite moving, and a great loving sense seemed to pervade this event. I'm grateful I had the stamina to take part in it today.

Wayne
 

silicon

Senior Member
Messages
148
It was a wonderful memorial. Thanks so much to Rivka for organizing it, and for hosting it with such sensitivity and grace, and to everyone who sharedit was so moving.
 

beaker

ME/cfs 1986
Messages
773
Location
USA
May the blessings of sleep bring refreshment and release
And the Angel of the moon call the rivers of dream
To soften the hardened earth of the outside life,
Disentangle from the trapped nets the hurt and sorrow
And awaken the young soul for the new tomorrow.

~from Vespers by John Odonohue
 

Wally

Senior Member
Messages
1,167
Rivka specifically asked that the "conference call" memorial service not be recorded by anyone who was listening in on this call. I have no idea if this request was followed, but I would hope that the spirit of the request would be honored to respect the privacy of those who participated in the call. Rivka was only able to identify the area code listed for each phone line that connected into the call. If someone wished to speak during the call she would identify them by their area code and they could choose to speak anonoymously or they could identify themselves by name or by an on-line handle. The technologically used to make this on-line memorial service happen was pretty amazing. Once again Rivka thinks outside the box to finds way to give the ME/CFS community a platform to join together. Thanks again Rivka!
 

RivkaRivka

Senior Member
Messages
368
hi tina, like what wally said, we did not record it. the family did not want it recorded.

hi wally, i'm so glad you were there. that meant a lot to me. thank you so much for your support and lovely words of praise about the call. it was amazing that we pulled it off, on a technological level. i think this can be a new model for having us gather together as a community. there is one ongoing support group already held like this, via conf call, organized by the virginia and wash dc area me/cfs group. so they paved the way in this technology. but i think using it for a memorial service is a first.
 

usedtobeperkytina

Senior Member
Messages
1,479
Location
Clay, Alabama
Rivka, I have been thinking of trying to do a news article on this and other new practices, such as people's facebook pages remaining active after they have died and friends posting to them as though they could see the post. As you said, this may have been a first.

I meant to listen to the memorial service. I remember 1.5 hours before it started. I made a mental note. And then I got distracted and forgot.

Tina
 

roxie60

Senior Member
Messages
1,791
Location
Central Illinois, USA
Thanks Rivka and others for doing this, I got to know what a wonderful person Patrick was thru all the comments. Chronic illness takes such a toll. I feel blessed to have participated and to be on this forum. No place like it when we face the flat earth thinkers and our own discouragement. I can only imagine the loss his family and friends feel.