I have physically taken a little dip. I was exercising doing weights and after I was done, my HR went up for a while while I was taking a shower, and I could not get it down. Is not like u can lay down on a public bathroom! so I hold it up for a long time until I could get back to office and put feet up.
I have been down ever since, but not too bad. Now this has a whole psychological ramification. I realize I am doing well but how fragile it all is. I am socializing too, going to the movies, friends gathering....
The intensity of crash and suffering I get today, is the same as when I was really sick so I wonder if the socializing is worth the payback.
That is worrying me a little because I find myself lately not wanting to do much socially. Overall I am good and except for the mood swings I am pretty good. I go from wow I am lucky that having CFS I can do all this stuff, to a pessimistic feeling that even though I am better I will always crash and have painful payback.
I am trying not to be too hard on myself, after all humans get conditioned psy by pain. So I guess my reaction to action / consequence is very normal. Activity = pain! So I have to rationalize myself and work on that. But I guess I need to accept my mood swings and move forward. My main symptom right now is the head and spine burning.
The Physical Vs psy issues
Blog entry posted by Seven (formerly lnester7), May 25, 2013.