Thanksgiving with the CFIDS Monkey on My Back

I did make it for Thanksgiving dinner with my friend. She came and got me and we went for a really nice free church dinner. Some of her friends were there and it was nice to finally be out with people. This was the first time I've been able to go out to dinner for a holiday in years.

The loudness of the crowd started to kill me at least halfway through. The whole sensory input thing. Like by the time we were ready to leave, I couldn't wait to leave.

I had no problem with the church stairs on the way down, but I had a huge, huge, massive problem with the stairs on the way up. Instant trigger for POTS. I had the tachycardia, the blood pressure dropped. I couldn't catch my breath. If we had not gotten straight to the car, it was like passout time. The church actually does have an elevator, but I didn't think to take it because I had been okay on the way down.

Once we got into the car and I could sit awhile, I was better.

So I really tried not to let anything ruin this Thanksgiving for me. But this is just typical life with this disease. And obviously, I cannot do stairs anymore.

At least the food and company were good. But like I said, that sensory input was just owww.

In other news, my doctor had to up my thyroid med. And I do have more energy with a higher dose. I'm noticing it. But it's kind of like, I can do alittle more, but the fatigue is still there. Like laundry isn't so much of a struggle. But I still have that fatigue and the swollen glands, too.

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And today is the Day After Payback. I am so sick today. This screaming pain was not worth it. Nothing on this earth is worth this amount of pain. Nothing. I don't think I'll be going out for Xmas. Not if it means this, no.

I have the full on flare now. Light, sound, everything hurts. My throat feels alittle sore, too. The glands in my neck hurt so bad that if anyone touches over there, I will scream. It's worse than if someone tried to strangle me.

I am not moving from this bed. And I have no idea when I will feel better. This could last for days.

Not worth it. The payback is never, ever worth it.
 
I so related to the "sensory overload" part of your story, Carrigon. On the rare occasions where I have gone to some gathering like that I started to get militant and smart about the sensory thing, and would wear earplugs and sunglasses- yes, indoors! The earplugs reduced the crowd noise to a low rumble, much better than the staccato high-range trebles that seem to irritate me so. And the sunglasses got a few "Jack Nicholson" comments, but I didn't give a rip. I still always leave "early" but that seems to give me more time within the herd. So sorry you crashed today after your event last night. Payback is a cruel taskmaster.
 
My friend used to wear ear muffs to restaurants. It's just unreal what we have to do to cope.
 
Hope you're feeling better - its not fair, its brutal and god knows why this has been your or anyone else's path.......and I hope you're finding some peace in the midst of it....

I must say that is another hilarious (and poignant) line - "I should be happy, but it is killing me"

Wishing you luck.
 
I'm still suffering. The glands in my neck hurt so badly that if someone touched me there, I'd scream. The fever went down, though. What I really need are days of rest, and I'm not sure I'll get that. I have to do this informal meeting on Monday to try to get a tenant out of my building. The stress level is very high and taking a tole on me.
 

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