We know well the sorrows of our own soul, but little of the sorrows of others …
Yeah. That’s the one. For everything and everyone I’ve lost, and just for good measure, for all the losses still lurking out there awaiting my arrival with malignant patience. For that old life that in retrospect looks so flucking perfect. But then, almost anything looks pretty perfect compared to this.
Some of the ‘things’ lost were taken pretty directly by this miserable little cheese-grater of an illness, slowly reducing me to small, disconnected bits and pieces, fragments of who and what I used to be. The “everyone’s” I lost were also, some of them, because of this creepy little illness, but not all of them. The friends who fell by the way after year 2, 3, or 6 of this, ad infinitum, were the most direct result.
So now, I not only get to mourn their loss, I have to mourn the time I lost with them because I just wasn’t really able to be there that day. Or month. Or year.
Those are the times when it’s easiest to forget that we’re not the only ones that fate has visited something more than the ordinary crappy on. There are many, many ways to find your life ripped out from under you, and it helps me (sometimes) to consider that fact when I’m sinking into the Slough of Despond. Other times it just pisses me off more, like their states of disability and pain and loss somehow subtract from the personal-pain impact of mine.
Which is, of course, ridiculous….
Some of those pains and losses may be deeply familiar to a lot of us, what with the overlap between ME and IBS and CCI, among all the others in the .....mmmmm..... rich diversity of M.E.
I suppose that it’s, I dunno ….maybe reassuring …… to know that ‘crappy’ is an equal opportunity destroyer.
Turning Down Food, Needing To Be Near A Bathroom At All Times, And 16 Other Struggles Physically Disabled People Face That You Might Not Have Even Considered
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/people-physical-disabilities-sharing-things-161502020.html
