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Overdoing It and Flaring Up

I've been having a stomach flare up for a week now. About twice a year, I get some kind of Crohn's disease like flare, usually from eating something my body absolutely can't handle, which seems to be most things now days. I had to buy all special foods. It's getting better, but still driving me crazy.

Oddly, the past two days, I've had more energy/stamina out of nowhere. So I did alot of things, which I'm paying for in spades tonight, with the added stomach stuff on top.

When we get those odd days of feeling better, it's impossible to resist wanting to do so many things that you usually can't do.

I was out walking in the sun for a short while today and it felt so good. Early in the morning, before it got too hot. Did have a major POTS attack when I got home and had to lay down and sleep for hours. But then I was okay, aside from the stomach cramps. And I went out with my friend, shopping and for dinner. If my stomach hadn't been killing me the entire time, I actually would have felt almost normal.

Good days for me are rare and when I get them, I try to do anything I can do, even if it means paying for it in spades for a week afterward.

I don't know how anyone expects us to "pace" a good day. You can't. It's like someone let you out of the cage or at least gave you alot more room on the leash for a short amount of time. And you just want to do so much.

So yeah, I'm already flaring, and I'm still awake at almost four am with that awful feeling of a rock on my bladder from the intestinal thing. It was sort of worth it today, just to be out doing stuff for once and not feeling like a zombie.

The saddest thing is, I know how I would be if I were well. I'd be unstoppable. If I were given my energy back and my health back, there is nothing that would stop me from doing anything. On these rare days, when I have alittle energy, it's like a glimpse into what I could be. I feel so held back from life. I want out of the cage and off the leash permanently.

Comments

Carrigon, I can totally relate to your last sentence. It's like I wrote it. I am sorry to hear you are flaring up..take care of yourself.
 
I feel for ya, Carrigon. Spitfire has already said it for me. I coulda written it as well. But not AS well as you did. Hugs, Marcie
 

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Carrigon
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