No Room for Toy Boys

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Sleep (or lack of it) has to be one of the most frustrating problems to solve in my life.<o:p></o:p>
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For many years I thought I was a light sleeper.<o:p></o:p>
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I thought that this was just me. When did my poor sleep pattern start? I really dont remember. Working in the <?xml:namespace prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:eek:ffice:smarttags" /><st1:country-region><st1:place>UK</st1:place></st1:country-region> in the late 1970s may have been the start. Sleeping lightly to hear if babies & toddlers woke during the night in distress, was something many Mothers take as a matter of course. <o:p></o:p>
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But I wasnt a Mother. I was a live in childrens Nanny who took her responsibilities very seriously. One of those was being there, wide awake, at the slightest sniffle or whimper from the babies/toddlers in my care.<o:p></o:p>
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I always slept the sleep of the dead in the 1980s as the side effect of the huge consumption of alcohol with fuelled my nights & early mornings. It also fuelled the enormous hangovers & morning afters. But in those days I was young, carefree & deliriously in love with the idea of being in love, wanting to be one of the herd. <o:p></o:p>
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Sheep herding is a common theme for the teens & twenty somethings even today. The idea of being in love is certainly high on the priorities of the young. Being in love is a dominant emotion of those newly married. Thinking back on love is a fond memory of some middle aged couples who have grown apart in the busy-ness of bringing up children. Rekindling love might be a powerful emotion for some Grandparents.<o:p></o:p>
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And looking back on love might be a distant memory for those forever single & heading towards old age like me.<o:p></o:p>
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But lust is a passion that never dies, whether youre single, married, divorced, widowed or, swap sides & bat for the other team.<o:p></o:p>
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Unless, you down size to a new King Single Bed. <o:p></o:p>
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Goodness, gracious me, I thought as I sipped my fragrant, morning brew of coffee (down to one deep, rich brewed coffee now, not 3 cups as in my recent working life to get me through the exhausting workday).<o:p></o:p>
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I had relationships with a couple of younger men (in my 30s & 40s), amongst others. <o:p></o:p>
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I have just downsized to a King Single bed (gave me more $$$ to spend), which arrived yesterday morning. I had been up at the crack of dawn in case the delivery was in the early part of the delivery time frame conveyed to me (the day before), instead of the recent arising time of 8.30am or so, in retirement. I was not only exhausted last night, but actually felt physically sick without my newly acquired hours of restful sleep in recent weeks. I nearly passed out at one stage yesterday. Proof to me, that more restful sleep in recent weeks is partly responsible for my reduced FM symptoms.<o:p></o:p>
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Yes, one of my deepest & most frustrating problems in the past was lack of sleep. Clinical studies have shown that if you deprive a healthy person of sleep for 3 days, they will acquire the pain & cognitive disfunction of Fibromyalgia Syndrome (amongst other health problems). Most of the time, sleep comes to me with a 25mg tablet of Amitriptyline (combined with a couple of prescription analgesics when my back/hip pain is excruciating).<o:p></o:p>
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So while exhausted last night, I tossed & turned in my new bed during the night. First the new pillow was too high, so I got up & replaced it with my old one (which was actually prepared & sitting on the chair - just in case). I awoke later & threw off the second bed cover as I was too hot. Then I awoke tangled in my long t-shirt nightie, as I couldnt roll over in the more narrow space a king single bed is only about a foot narrower than a double bed in fact. I threw off my nightie in frustration. I finally slept in my natural state unemcumbered by the confines of night clothes.<o:p></o:p>
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The new bed was much higher than my old one & surprisingly easy to make up. And this morning, I was able to get out & stand up much more easily (than my previous painful emergence from my old double bed).<o:p></o:p>
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But now Im having breakfast and I just realized..<o:p></o:p>
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Theres no longer room for a Toy Boy!<o:p></o:p>



Comments

Vicki - I hope you will re-think your choice and exchange your King Single......most mattresses come with a 30 day exchange option. I really thought you had plans for more fun in retirement;) WHAT were you THINKING??:eek:
 
The above comment is great! Or, you can have someone over and truly snuggle because you will have no choice! I have a queen bed and even with all of that space, I don't want a bed companion. I like sleeping solo! They can have another room!
 
It's ok Lily, I was just having a chuckle to myself when having breakfast :D - I'm quite happy with down sizing the bed & my solitary sleeping routine - have been for many years ;). (note: I said sleeping routine).

I wish I'd had a better night's sleep last night, though :(.

Maybe it will take time to adjust to the super cushioning & different materials of my new bed. I love the size & height.

I feel like a wealthy, princess sprawling atop a pile of expensive cushions as depicted in the picture above.

At least my bedroom & it's contents smell fresh & alive - it always smelt musty & airless before (I found the mould on the valance & old bed).

Note: Electrical & furniture cannot be returned to this department store unless the merchandise is faulty or as otherwise required by law - I knew this before I had it delivered.
 
I agree with you Spitfire.

I have always preferred to sleep alone.

Being such a light sleeper for many, many years (even before FM), I could never sleep even with the sound of someone breathing in the room.

The Spitfire;bt1218 said:
The above comment is great! Or, you can have someone over and truly snuggle because you will have no choice! I have a queen bed and even with all of that space, I don't want a bed companion. I like sleeping solo! They can have another room!
 
Well Vicki, your toy boy will find you regardless of what size bed you have. And since you like to sleep alone, well, there are plenty of places in the home that do well for other activities...and all that rest and reduced pain will certainly increase your allure.

Oh man. I envy you the coffee. I can't drink it, and your description was so good it reminded me of some of what I love about it. Understanding friends let me sniff the steam from their cups. Another memory of love.
 
Sunday,
sometimes I think the aroma of a good freshly brewed coffee is actually better than the taste.
I was going to give it up completely (the coffee, not the toy boys :D), but I kind of like drinking it while I check my emails first thing in the morning.
It's become a "ritual", so I might not give it up at all............perhaps.
 
Spitfire, did you mean to say coffee enemas & bummer in the same line - I was highly amused, but I shall look at tomorrow morning's rich brew with new eyes - shame coffee is dark brown in colour......

and Cort, you don't have to say anything - toy boys are much more amusing than Aromatherapy. Just be thankful, I didn't post anything X-rated on that Blog. I was very tempted & then thought of the genteel members & back-spaced very, very quickly.
 

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