life is not fun

Life is not fun if you can’t sit up without feeling like you’re going to pass out. And if you sit for a while you start to get a horrible body feeling like something with your body is horribly wrong.

Life is not fun if a friend visits you and you have to ask them to leave after 15 minutes because chatting with them is causing symptom flares that drive you into bed.

Life is not fun if you lie in bed feeling nauseous, achy, dizzy, feverish, and with sinus irritation that is so bad that sneezing fits are a routine part of your life.

Life is not fun if you feel so sick you can’t handle a ride to the doctor.

Right now even lying flat in bed doesn’t reduce the symptoms as much as it used to.

I don’t tell any of my old friends how awful my life is because it’s such a downer. But I’m telling you because you know how it feels. And right now it is much worse than usual.

This illness waxes and wanes. And I hope I have the strength to make it to the next point in time when it’s not so horribly awful. But right now I wonder if it will ever come. Because I’ve been suffering with this so long it gets very hard to keep my hopes up.

Comments

@Andrew- thanks for posting this. I can really relate to all you have mentioned here...but especially hiding how awful things are from friends...and I am so tired of being told 'well, you LOOK very well', when I feel terrible.
I hope that brighter day is just around the corner for you.
 
Hi Andrew. So sorry you're feeling so bad. Hoping you feel better soon. Yes, we can feel your pain.
 
I'm sorry you're feeling so bad. It's horrible when you go through a bad patch, and you worry that it won't end. I'm there with you - not that telling you will help you unfortunately. But, I'm sending metaphorical gentle hugs anyway. Sometimes life just sucks.
 

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