I had a huge blowout with my uncle over this disease tonight. Alot of things. It was bad. But tonight, I finally saw the light of what he's doing.
He is insisting that there is no disease and that I'm just that "fat, lazy relative who doesn't want to work" because he doesn't want to continue helping me financially. So by putting it all on me and making it that I am choosing not to work or go to school, that absolves him of any responsibility to help me at all. He just fully ignores anything I say that I've been on disability for twenty years for a REAL physical disease. And he insists that I work or go to school. Nothing I have ever said changes his tune. I have given him and his wife all kinds of articles and info on CFIDS/ME over the years. My mother once even sent them a video on it, but they refused to watch it. I have fully described in great detail the symptoms of this disease and my level of disability from it. None of it makes any impression at all.
Tonight, he let slip again how if he continues to help me, it will be forever. He can well afford it, he just doesn't want to do it. But instead of coming out and saying that, he just keeps insisting I'm faking my illness for twenty years and therefore, I won't help myself. It's just a nasty and evil thing to do. He's known for his manipulations and such. He does the same to his own daughter.
I think this whole money issue is at the root of why so many people refuse to believe us. It's not that they refuse to believe, it's that they are using it as a smokescreen. No one wants to pay for treatments for us, therefore, we have to be crazy, they need us to be crazy.
The psychiatric lobby just wants to make money off us, so they will always insist we're crazy.
No one wants to help us at all, so it's easier to say we're insane and put it all onto us. Or insist we're faking it. It puts it on us. So they can justify anything they want to justify. And until there is a real blood test to stop this practice, they will all continue to do so. Until we have vindication in the news, and this disease takes its rightful place in the general public's perceptions as a REAL physically disabling disease, we will continue to be abused by everyone.
I saw the light, it's too bad my relatives and other people can't. But I know what they are doing now and the why of it.
This whole blow out came about because I've been worse since I moved, and that has led to me doing worse financially. The move devastated me physically and financially. I did not come out and ask my uncle for money, I only told them how bad I was doing. And the response I got was, we can't continue to help you because "you're that fat, lazy relative who doesn't want to work", and unless you go to school or get a job and "prove to us" that you are trying to do something with your life, we won't help you. Real nice, isn't it? Telling someone who has been on disability for twenty years and is steadily getting worse now, to go do things she can't do.
I'm just so sick of them doing this to me. And they will no doubt twist everything I've said again and keep insisting that I'm mentally ill. That's what they do. When I describe the symptoms, they tell me it's a form of mental illness. They just keep trying to force it all on me. I'm supposed to prove I'm physically sick, but no amount of "proof" is taken seriously.
I'll probably end up losing my car this year, as they will not help me again. But I am resigned to letting God deal with them. And I'll have to find a way to get by with the curb to curb busing. They said alot of cruel things to me. Really designed to hurt. So, I guess this was the end of the relative relationship tonight because I'm not going to take it anymore.
He is insisting that there is no disease and that I'm just that "fat, lazy relative who doesn't want to work" because he doesn't want to continue helping me financially. So by putting it all on me and making it that I am choosing not to work or go to school, that absolves him of any responsibility to help me at all. He just fully ignores anything I say that I've been on disability for twenty years for a REAL physical disease. And he insists that I work or go to school. Nothing I have ever said changes his tune. I have given him and his wife all kinds of articles and info on CFIDS/ME over the years. My mother once even sent them a video on it, but they refused to watch it. I have fully described in great detail the symptoms of this disease and my level of disability from it. None of it makes any impression at all.
Tonight, he let slip again how if he continues to help me, it will be forever. He can well afford it, he just doesn't want to do it. But instead of coming out and saying that, he just keeps insisting I'm faking my illness for twenty years and therefore, I won't help myself. It's just a nasty and evil thing to do. He's known for his manipulations and such. He does the same to his own daughter.
I think this whole money issue is at the root of why so many people refuse to believe us. It's not that they refuse to believe, it's that they are using it as a smokescreen. No one wants to pay for treatments for us, therefore, we have to be crazy, they need us to be crazy.
The psychiatric lobby just wants to make money off us, so they will always insist we're crazy.
No one wants to help us at all, so it's easier to say we're insane and put it all onto us. Or insist we're faking it. It puts it on us. So they can justify anything they want to justify. And until there is a real blood test to stop this practice, they will all continue to do so. Until we have vindication in the news, and this disease takes its rightful place in the general public's perceptions as a REAL physically disabling disease, we will continue to be abused by everyone.
I saw the light, it's too bad my relatives and other people can't. But I know what they are doing now and the why of it.
This whole blow out came about because I've been worse since I moved, and that has led to me doing worse financially. The move devastated me physically and financially. I did not come out and ask my uncle for money, I only told them how bad I was doing. And the response I got was, we can't continue to help you because "you're that fat, lazy relative who doesn't want to work", and unless you go to school or get a job and "prove to us" that you are trying to do something with your life, we won't help you. Real nice, isn't it? Telling someone who has been on disability for twenty years and is steadily getting worse now, to go do things she can't do.
I'm just so sick of them doing this to me. And they will no doubt twist everything I've said again and keep insisting that I'm mentally ill. That's what they do. When I describe the symptoms, they tell me it's a form of mental illness. They just keep trying to force it all on me. I'm supposed to prove I'm physically sick, but no amount of "proof" is taken seriously.
I'll probably end up losing my car this year, as they will not help me again. But I am resigned to letting God deal with them. And I'll have to find a way to get by with the curb to curb busing. They said alot of cruel things to me. Really designed to hurt. So, I guess this was the end of the relative relationship tonight because I'm not going to take it anymore.
