Yes, I'm finally offering up the fruits of my chosen labor of love. My expression to the masses. Well, not very many of the masses will be watching or listening. But I've never let that stop me. And neither should you. Don't stop. Unless you're doing something bad. So you know, bad things should be kept to a minimum. For instead, you may subscribe to the ideal of moderation. The Middle Path. Either way, this video and my song define the path. Or at least, in a singular space and time it was so defined.
Today I've been told that I MAY no longer be able to leave the property. My days of touring and traveling MAY be over. Why? Because I need a doctor's written permission each and every time I roll off the property. Of course, that's not feasible. I leave the property at least once per day, if not multiple times. Am I nearby? Yes. Of course.
Oh, and they don't want me in the parking lot either.
So where does that leave me?
Hmmm… I'm going to fight this. Unless, of course, there is no fight to be fought. I fully intend to sneak around from now on, rather than disclosing anything to anybody. So often in life I do my best to do the right thing, and I am punished for this. It seems as though the people who take advantage of the upper hand, but I know that's not always the case.
In addition, if I roll off the property, it was explained to me that insurance will be notified… and insurance will likely end my stay at the nursing home.
Why is that?
Because apparently, if I'm healthy enough to roll my way down a bike path at 3.7 mph, I can very well support and care for myself and get a job and have a wife and kids and burp blubbery babies, change diapers, and go to the bar so that I may drink overpriced liquor and then tool around town driving drunk at top notch power chair speed before I head off to a local professional sporting event to root root root for my team because professional sports teams are super important. So then it's booze, and then I'll need to find some Quaaludes. I think. Heck, do Quaaludes even still exist? I've heard unsubstantiated rumors. Actually, I think all rumors are unsubstantiated. Because I guess .. that's the essence of a rumor.
So again, we go back to my NOT having or receiving disability. Or my NOT being diagnosed.
If I were receiving disability, I could live in an assisted living center. Or share a home with other disabled people, probably a back of the line location down in South Phoenix. Or I could rent a room from somebody, then have a caregiver come over every few days to help me shower. Things like that.
So right now, the problem being, and as they've mentioned, if insurance gets wind of things I will lose their insurance, and then I will be homeless. At least, that's the threat. Or the reality. Or both.
Yes, insurance is my master, and they are the ones keeping me alive. Plus, they did pay for the damn power chair that allows me to enjoy life more dynamically.
So in reality, I should just behave like a good nursing home victim and sit in my room and wait for my fucking disability to be approved. And it should happen it really really should. This time. Why? Well, check this out!
In the least, I've been diagnosed with Delusional Disorder. And Personality Disorder (if I'm reading my record right, MULTIPLE personality disorders!), Somatization Disorder. Anorexia. Pa'nar Syndrome. Adult Autism. Nail Psoriasis. Active Epstein-Barr. Severe Gastroparesis. Nihilism. The Phage. Bio-temporal Flux. Kamaraazite Flu. Plak Tow. Rop'ngor. Sebaceous Cyst. Stab Wound. Synthococcus Novae. And lastly but not least, the dreaded T'lokan Schism!
So you know, there's been a drastic change here in the psychiatric department. And also, with the doctoring department. I have not received a doctor's visit in two months (oddly enough, they've been billing me $338 per visit, so collections is all over my ass!). But what matters most is that the psychiatrist who did most of the false diagnosing, quit. Or he's on an involuntary leave of abstinence. That means no sex with other psychiatrists (for him), I suppose. Not sure if that's really a problem deep down in the psychiatric trenches, but you never know. I mean really, how could I? Sometimes it's all a matter of happenstance and foregone conclusions.
Original Intentions
Heck, I still need to call this song something. Up until now it's always been named "July 12th" - Why that moniker? Well, that's when I started in on the song. That's when the slow meticulous headway began. And I thank each of you for helping me get back into that groove. I've now got the necessary components to continue making music and continue being creative.
So yeah, eventually I'll release some real actual traveling footage (without fancy-pants editing and such). Either way, I hope you enjoy the visuals, because they at least offer a vague idea of what's going on over here.
Regarding the music, I don't know what to say. Despite being cheerful, it's probably somewhat unsettling. Or perhaps not. I don't know. Everything sounds normal to me. Musically. But this one sounds more normal. I finished a Country Hip-Hop song about 3 weeks ago. But I don't think anyone's ready for that one yet, so this song was next up to bat.
Take care. Hopefully I can furnish a normal kind of blog entry soon. In any case, I just really wanted to get this one out. I wanted to show you that I've been working on things, and working towards things.
H
Today I've been told that I MAY no longer be able to leave the property. My days of touring and traveling MAY be over. Why? Because I need a doctor's written permission each and every time I roll off the property. Of course, that's not feasible. I leave the property at least once per day, if not multiple times. Am I nearby? Yes. Of course.
Oh, and they don't want me in the parking lot either.
So where does that leave me?
Hmmm… I'm going to fight this. Unless, of course, there is no fight to be fought. I fully intend to sneak around from now on, rather than disclosing anything to anybody. So often in life I do my best to do the right thing, and I am punished for this. It seems as though the people who take advantage of the upper hand, but I know that's not always the case.
In addition, if I roll off the property, it was explained to me that insurance will be notified… and insurance will likely end my stay at the nursing home.
Why is that?
Because apparently, if I'm healthy enough to roll my way down a bike path at 3.7 mph, I can very well support and care for myself and get a job and have a wife and kids and burp blubbery babies, change diapers, and go to the bar so that I may drink overpriced liquor and then tool around town driving drunk at top notch power chair speed before I head off to a local professional sporting event to root root root for my team because professional sports teams are super important. So then it's booze, and then I'll need to find some Quaaludes. I think. Heck, do Quaaludes even still exist? I've heard unsubstantiated rumors. Actually, I think all rumors are unsubstantiated. Because I guess .. that's the essence of a rumor.
So again, we go back to my NOT having or receiving disability. Or my NOT being diagnosed.
If I were receiving disability, I could live in an assisted living center. Or share a home with other disabled people, probably a back of the line location down in South Phoenix. Or I could rent a room from somebody, then have a caregiver come over every few days to help me shower. Things like that.
So right now, the problem being, and as they've mentioned, if insurance gets wind of things I will lose their insurance, and then I will be homeless. At least, that's the threat. Or the reality. Or both.
Yes, insurance is my master, and they are the ones keeping me alive. Plus, they did pay for the damn power chair that allows me to enjoy life more dynamically.
So in reality, I should just behave like a good nursing home victim and sit in my room and wait for my fucking disability to be approved. And it should happen it really really should. This time. Why? Well, check this out!
In the least, I've been diagnosed with Delusional Disorder. And Personality Disorder (if I'm reading my record right, MULTIPLE personality disorders!), Somatization Disorder. Anorexia. Pa'nar Syndrome. Adult Autism. Nail Psoriasis. Active Epstein-Barr. Severe Gastroparesis. Nihilism. The Phage. Bio-temporal Flux. Kamaraazite Flu. Plak Tow. Rop'ngor. Sebaceous Cyst. Stab Wound. Synthococcus Novae. And lastly but not least, the dreaded T'lokan Schism!
So you know, there's been a drastic change here in the psychiatric department. And also, with the doctoring department. I have not received a doctor's visit in two months (oddly enough, they've been billing me $338 per visit, so collections is all over my ass!). But what matters most is that the psychiatrist who did most of the false diagnosing, quit. Or he's on an involuntary leave of abstinence. That means no sex with other psychiatrists (for him), I suppose. Not sure if that's really a problem deep down in the psychiatric trenches, but you never know. I mean really, how could I? Sometimes it's all a matter of happenstance and foregone conclusions.
Original Intentions
Heck, I still need to call this song something. Up until now it's always been named "July 12th" - Why that moniker? Well, that's when I started in on the song. That's when the slow meticulous headway began. And I thank each of you for helping me get back into that groove. I've now got the necessary components to continue making music and continue being creative.
So yeah, eventually I'll release some real actual traveling footage (without fancy-pants editing and such). Either way, I hope you enjoy the visuals, because they at least offer a vague idea of what's going on over here.
Regarding the music, I don't know what to say. Despite being cheerful, it's probably somewhat unsettling. Or perhaps not. I don't know. Everything sounds normal to me. Musically. But this one sounds more normal. I finished a Country Hip-Hop song about 3 weeks ago. But I don't think anyone's ready for that one yet, so this song was next up to bat.
Take care. Hopefully I can furnish a normal kind of blog entry soon. In any case, I just really wanted to get this one out. I wanted to show you that I've been working on things, and working towards things.
H