October 5th, 2021
TV Battle
In case you missed it, I was given a flat screen television to utilize for my pleasure.. by an unknown somebody. And Jeff (my roommate) subsequently erupted like a volcano. Not like the current one in Las Palmas, but something more akin to a Strombolian Eruption. Something massive. Mount Pinatubo? Was that the one? 1991-ish, I seem to recall.
As it stands, I believe Jeff's behavior is passive aggressive. But I'm too lazy to look up specifics on that one. And according to FIFA, I'm not allowed to disclose pertinent details regarding the patient in question. Nor am I allowed by the FAA governing body. Remember, they've got that black box thing going on. Or was that Carl Jung? Or perhaps less likely, "The Man in the Box" by Alice in Chains.
Give It Away
So now they are considering an alternate option, giving Jeff the blasted flat screen.. a thing that won't be watched all that often (by me) anyway. Although, I am wanting to watch future Phoenix Suns basketball games. And maybe the Cardinals. An occasional distraction. Yet athletics essentially do not matter in real life. But sometimes my life isn't all that real.
In any case, this watching would be a "visuals only" experience. Perhaps utilizing closed captioning for the hearing impaired.
My reasons for being impaired are altogether different than anybody and everybody else's. With exceptions, of course. Some of you are out there riding this same plane of non-existence as I.
Out of the Blues and into the Black Night
"I used to be a plain clothes officer.
But now I'm a sergeant at arms length.
Hold me close.
Hold me Titanic!"
Those were made up lyrics. But at any given point in time, all lyrics are "made up" - So there you go.
Battle for a Commode
It took 24 hours, but I was finally officially able to secure a bedside commode. Portable Style. But now (after 12 long hours of holding it) I no longer need to go. So there's that. There's also the fact that there are no rubber grippers to hold the darned thing in place. Basically, the Commode Skates like Dorothy Hamill!
*ice skating reference - See also: new reality show on NBC. Or Peacock.
So still I wait. Perhaps tomorrow.
And they do seem to be very low on supplies here, across the board (luckily I brought many of my own). Even so, they were finally able to secure applesauce for me. Somebody knew somebody who knew somebody else who had a brother-in-law. Then Nurse Tina delivered. Now I can ingest my daily probiotics.
Update: 1717 hours
Acquiring any type of rubber grippers, or anything else that would affix itself to the bottom of the commode are no longer a possibility, because the day shift has now gone home. So I've got to hold it again, until tomorrow. Although hell, I just may just chance it anyway ... this sensation is just getting more and more uncomfortable.
Noise v. Noise
Wow. No one would believe, but get this, I've taken to signing! You know, sign language. But I only know three signing words. Two of which are user-unfriendly.
And I just had a guy in here flashing gang signs at me for a good long five minutes, before he realized I can only give him the universal Thumbs Up in response. Why only up? Because if you give them the thumbs down they automatically inspect your genitals. And heck, nobody wants that!
Barnyard Animals
So this old dude.. let's call him Jeff, plays some sort of video game where these cows moo at incredible volume. Total end to end reverberation. Other barnyard animals make noises, too. If they don't moo, they do rooster kinds of shit. Or chickens. Admittedly, I'm not all that familiar with barnyard animals. Yes, I watched and read Animal Farm, billions of years ago, but it didn't quite stick.
Skin Care Specialist Helps, Organizes
Let's get redundant here. A blonde woman with blonde hair enters the room. She sorts through my box of formula feeding supplies, places them where I indicate. Then vacates the premises.
I didn't hear a word she said (over the deafening roar that is my roommate), but apparently, I hear lips. Or read mouths.
Covid-19 Rewind
They never swabbed me for covid-19 prior to entering this locked down facility. And that leads me to believe many things. None of them good.
Medical Talk
The physical therapist hung out with me for a spell. And she was fascinated by my undiagnosed illness status, and the funky way my muscles nearly cease functioning following any direct stimulation.
So, she promised she'll investigate further. Seemed invested, perplexed, the usual, etc. But really, I just need her to sign off, promote, or support any and all potential referrals.
Her body language and physical actions seem to support the words out of her mouth. Her eyes were especially trained on me.. every movement, every gesture.
Later, the Physician's Assistant visited, and she too said the right things. But she also had one plastic baggy foot out the door, so I had to find ways to entice her, make her want to buy-in. However, she was devoid of all emotion. She was mentally elsewhere, far and away.
*I can totally tell when someone is into me, or into what I am saying. Of course it took decades to learn how to recognize the clues, to learn how to assemble them properly.
Surprises at 8 o'clock
Jeff was ill earlier, and I helped out. Lunch made him violently ill, so I shouted down a nurse because no one was responding. No big deal. But then later, the nurse didn't know why his heart rate was elevated, and I explained his vomiting/likely dehydration (he's not hydrating either).
Later I asked him how he was doing, and then he kept talking to me. So I put my tablet aside, as he kept saying things with his mouth. And then……. he suggested we watch Monday Night Football together. I didn't really want to, but I figured - male bonding, right?
And we watched and interacted and I said football things and he did, too. And now, I think I wore him out. He's been quiet, and sometimes quietly groaning, ever since.
Emotional Toll
I'm kind of wondering what's going on at home. But I probably shouldn't go there.
Okay. I officially miss my wife tonight. I am sad. I want to talk to her. Just conversation. Or anything. Or nothing in particular. I want her to want me back.
That's Cool
But she did drop off the fan on her way home from work. And the staff even brought it to me in a timely fashion.. probably because they were complaining about how damn hot it is in my room, too.
Sign Off
Tomorrow is dentist visit Number One. And I really need these people to fix that damned commode.
Goodnight -----
The "Heck Yeah!" Update
Seeing that I was awake, my overnight nurse wandered into my space around 4:15 to check on things. So I quietly explained my commode dilemma (she immediately understood the gist of the problem). And she promised she'd find a fully functional bedside commode by any means necessary. And guess what? She did just that!
And so you know, having now resolved this issue, you shall benefit far more than I. Why? NO MORE COMMODE TALK! I PROMISE! Unless she, I, or both of us gets busted for thievery, or worse.
Take care,
H
TV Battle
In case you missed it, I was given a flat screen television to utilize for my pleasure.. by an unknown somebody. And Jeff (my roommate) subsequently erupted like a volcano. Not like the current one in Las Palmas, but something more akin to a Strombolian Eruption. Something massive. Mount Pinatubo? Was that the one? 1991-ish, I seem to recall.
As it stands, I believe Jeff's behavior is passive aggressive. But I'm too lazy to look up specifics on that one. And according to FIFA, I'm not allowed to disclose pertinent details regarding the patient in question. Nor am I allowed by the FAA governing body. Remember, they've got that black box thing going on. Or was that Carl Jung? Or perhaps less likely, "The Man in the Box" by Alice in Chains.
Give It Away
So now they are considering an alternate option, giving Jeff the blasted flat screen.. a thing that won't be watched all that often (by me) anyway. Although, I am wanting to watch future Phoenix Suns basketball games. And maybe the Cardinals. An occasional distraction. Yet athletics essentially do not matter in real life. But sometimes my life isn't all that real.
In any case, this watching would be a "visuals only" experience. Perhaps utilizing closed captioning for the hearing impaired.
My reasons for being impaired are altogether different than anybody and everybody else's. With exceptions, of course. Some of you are out there riding this same plane of non-existence as I.
Out of the Blues and into the Black Night
"I used to be a plain clothes officer.
But now I'm a sergeant at arms length.
Hold me close.
Hold me Titanic!"
Those were made up lyrics. But at any given point in time, all lyrics are "made up" - So there you go.
Battle for a Commode
It took 24 hours, but I was finally officially able to secure a bedside commode. Portable Style. But now (after 12 long hours of holding it) I no longer need to go. So there's that. There's also the fact that there are no rubber grippers to hold the darned thing in place. Basically, the Commode Skates like Dorothy Hamill!
*ice skating reference - See also: new reality show on NBC. Or Peacock.
So still I wait. Perhaps tomorrow.
And they do seem to be very low on supplies here, across the board (luckily I brought many of my own). Even so, they were finally able to secure applesauce for me. Somebody knew somebody who knew somebody else who had a brother-in-law. Then Nurse Tina delivered. Now I can ingest my daily probiotics.
Update: 1717 hours
Acquiring any type of rubber grippers, or anything else that would affix itself to the bottom of the commode are no longer a possibility, because the day shift has now gone home. So I've got to hold it again, until tomorrow. Although hell, I just may just chance it anyway ... this sensation is just getting more and more uncomfortable.
Noise v. Noise
Wow. No one would believe, but get this, I've taken to signing! You know, sign language. But I only know three signing words. Two of which are user-unfriendly.
And I just had a guy in here flashing gang signs at me for a good long five minutes, before he realized I can only give him the universal Thumbs Up in response. Why only up? Because if you give them the thumbs down they automatically inspect your genitals. And heck, nobody wants that!
Barnyard Animals
So this old dude.. let's call him Jeff, plays some sort of video game where these cows moo at incredible volume. Total end to end reverberation. Other barnyard animals make noises, too. If they don't moo, they do rooster kinds of shit. Or chickens. Admittedly, I'm not all that familiar with barnyard animals. Yes, I watched and read Animal Farm, billions of years ago, but it didn't quite stick.
Skin Care Specialist Helps, Organizes
Let's get redundant here. A blonde woman with blonde hair enters the room. She sorts through my box of formula feeding supplies, places them where I indicate. Then vacates the premises.
I didn't hear a word she said (over the deafening roar that is my roommate), but apparently, I hear lips. Or read mouths.
Covid-19 Rewind
They never swabbed me for covid-19 prior to entering this locked down facility. And that leads me to believe many things. None of them good.
Medical Talk
The physical therapist hung out with me for a spell. And she was fascinated by my undiagnosed illness status, and the funky way my muscles nearly cease functioning following any direct stimulation.
So, she promised she'll investigate further. Seemed invested, perplexed, the usual, etc. But really, I just need her to sign off, promote, or support any and all potential referrals.
Her body language and physical actions seem to support the words out of her mouth. Her eyes were especially trained on me.. every movement, every gesture.
Later, the Physician's Assistant visited, and she too said the right things. But she also had one plastic baggy foot out the door, so I had to find ways to entice her, make her want to buy-in. However, she was devoid of all emotion. She was mentally elsewhere, far and away.
*I can totally tell when someone is into me, or into what I am saying. Of course it took decades to learn how to recognize the clues, to learn how to assemble them properly.
Surprises at 8 o'clock
Jeff was ill earlier, and I helped out. Lunch made him violently ill, so I shouted down a nurse because no one was responding. No big deal. But then later, the nurse didn't know why his heart rate was elevated, and I explained his vomiting/likely dehydration (he's not hydrating either).
Later I asked him how he was doing, and then he kept talking to me. So I put my tablet aside, as he kept saying things with his mouth. And then……. he suggested we watch Monday Night Football together. I didn't really want to, but I figured - male bonding, right?
And we watched and interacted and I said football things and he did, too. And now, I think I wore him out. He's been quiet, and sometimes quietly groaning, ever since.
Emotional Toll
I'm kind of wondering what's going on at home. But I probably shouldn't go there.
Okay. I officially miss my wife tonight. I am sad. I want to talk to her. Just conversation. Or anything. Or nothing in particular. I want her to want me back.
That's Cool
But she did drop off the fan on her way home from work. And the staff even brought it to me in a timely fashion.. probably because they were complaining about how damn hot it is in my room, too.
Sign Off
Tomorrow is dentist visit Number One. And I really need these people to fix that damned commode.
Goodnight -----
The "Heck Yeah!" Update
Seeing that I was awake, my overnight nurse wandered into my space around 4:15 to check on things. So I quietly explained my commode dilemma (she immediately understood the gist of the problem). And she promised she'd find a fully functional bedside commode by any means necessary. And guess what? She did just that!
And so you know, having now resolved this issue, you shall benefit far more than I. Why? NO MORE COMMODE TALK! I PROMISE! Unless she, I, or both of us gets busted for thievery, or worse.
Take care,
H
