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Bipolar One more Time

The initial success that I had with Truehope was the beginning for me and I will always be grateful to them for getting my mind working again.

In December of 2007, things were progressing. The arthritic pain my hands had disappeared within 24 hours of starting a gluten-free diet. I found myself thinking about "inflammation" more and more. Likely 95-98% (my numbers) of all human ailments and disease are either caused by inflammation or have inflammation as one of the primary symptoms.

I started to push some of the antioxidants. There was nothing scientific about this process. I was on the net and listening to what other people were doing. I tried Coenzyme Q10. I knew that my particular flavour of Bipolar got worse after the age of 40 and I was looking a supporting systems that started to tire around then.

CoQ10 drops off in our 40's and it became my first trial. It put me through a full Bipolar cycle. Hypomania followed by depression. It is a good thing that I had Truehope on board or it might have been a dilly. As it was I just got a bit grandiose and hyper-productive.

Snap. What the hell just happened? I started to read about CoQ10 and its role in the mitochondria and energy production. I learned about the production of our bodies main free-radical, superoxide. This is oxygen that is missing an electron and scavenges it from wherever it can.

The importance of this can not be over-stated. 20% of all the food you eat today will be used to repair the damage done by free-radicals. I found myself thinking about oxidation and mitochondria a lot. Especially, about glutathione.

Stick with me. This is a bit detailed but it is important. There is a low glutathione theory for just about every human ailment. More later but it is the current idea on production of Bipolar symptoms, it is part of CFS and it is part of my colon problem. As I said, more later.

So, it is January 2008. I find out that Alpha Lipoic Acid is an important antioxidant. Like Co Q10 it is found in everyone and one of the things that it does is replenish glutathione.

Oh yeah, we were starting to talk about glutathione weren't we? OK. You would be dead in around 5-8 seconds without glutathione. It is our body's most important antioxidant. The grand-daddy of them all. Other antioxidants like Vit C and Vit E work in part by giving up electrons to recycle glutathione.

So, in January I was looking for ways to increase the effectiveness of glutathione and I found out that alpha lipoic acid was both water and fat soluble and could go anywhere. Perfect.

Except that it made me ill. I got heavy-feeling, my thinking clouded, mood tanked and I got a particular "I don't give a shit" irritability that was part of my mood disorder.

I took a break and tried it again to be sure. It is my opinion that I may have never totally recovered from that second attempt. Later I would learn that alpha lipoic acid is not to be used in this way as it can move mercury across the BBB. But Mercury was not on my radar yet.

Every November, I got depressed. The beginning of the third week give or take a few days. It happened every year. My employer even started to make plans for me based on my being off for a few days at that time. Around 2006, I discovered that nicotine gum helped a lot with this. I would start at the beginning of November and stop in March.

More on this later but suffice to say that chewing gum and especially nicotine gum is not recommended if a person has fillings. It has a tough consistency and people chew it aggressively to withdraw the active ingredient.

2008 was the last year that I did not have to worry about energy. I got a lot of stuff done. My mood was not always good. Those of you with Mixed States will understand how you can have energy and yet a dark mood.

I remained on Truehope and it controlled the cycling. I didn't have to crawl into bed and I wasn't needing to apologize for my behaviour. But things are far from perfect. I would not meet the criteria for Bipolar, but I would for Mood Disorder NOS.

I am going to leave it here. I continue to struggle for the next year. In 2009, the itchiness started. We are going to fast-forward to 2010 next time as it was a watershed in terms of my health.

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