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Anniversaries / Death Depicted and Discovered


As of today it's been two years since I first came to reside at the nursing home. And somehow I've survived this ordeal. Of course, many haven't. The average lifespan of a nursing home male species inductee is approximately 6 months. Females typically last 9 months. It's true though, that I hadn't come to a nursing home because I was aged and decrepit, nonetheless, I came in physically messed up, emotionally bankrupt, and mentally fatigued.

But now I've improved. Very much so. That's even despite my bout of covid-19 (or whatever the heck forced me back unto the mattress 6 weeks ago). I seem finally to be coming out of it. Since Saturday I've been able to roam about in my chair for several hours each day. So hurray for me!

Things were looking bleak for a short period of time (my perspective), a matter of weeks went by without any sign of shaking the symptoms loose.


Because I'm recovering, I may indeed leave this nursing home environment sooner than later. My goal is to depart this month (waiting and waiting and waiting on an SSI decision). My back up to the backup plan entails moving into my former wife's garage. Living there. That can only be done once the temperatures drop down to reasonable levels. It'll still be in excess of 100° this Thursday and Friday, so we aren't quite out of it yet. But the nights are cool. Relaxing. Almost welcoming. It's not a matter of life or death anymore when I go outdoors during the wrong time of the day.

Speaking of Death…

I've been able to catch up with my homeless pals, and I finally got the lowdown on the missing corpse from weeks ago. It turns out the body was found near the canal (the one depicted in the pictures I've posted). The scene of the crime was approximately three miles due north of the nursing home.

My friends may (or may not have) been involved with pulling the body out of the canal. And they may also have reported the incident to the police. For reasons that make entirely too much sense, no one in particular wants to settle on exacting details that could lead to their individualized involvement (as it pertains to the investigation).

The victim was a middle-aged homeless fellow. Based on the way the crime scene was laid out, my friend guessed he had been murdered - blood at the scene variably dispatched. And then also based on the manner in which police and detectives alike gathered evidence. So yeah, there's no telling.

They gathered around my phone as I tried searching on the internet for anything newsworthy and related (from that time frame), and weren't able to find anything matching. So it's possible my friend's details were off. Or possibly, because it was a homeless person, it didn't make the papers. Didn't make the grade. Or wasn't worth an internet story. Which I imagine is the case. They can't report every death, everywhere, every time.

Apparently, I'd met this guy before (they'd confirmed I had, but I cannot rightly picture him). Obviously and clearly, I'd met him prior to his untimely death. They said the guy was kind of ornery and didn't really express much beyond grunting and groaning. Long hair. Tall and skinny. Typically hunched over, something having to do with upper spine problems. Oftentimes mumbling.

I don't know. There's so many of them. Sadly. So many of them passing by and passing through.

So that's it for the trauma drama for now.

Relocated / Dislocated

Otherwise, my friends are camping out in the open desert now, probably no more than 4 miles away from where I am now. They want and need to be left alone. Due to the season, it's not absolutely necessary that they be all that close to an available water source, not like before - because the heat is abating (more or less). Lugging water back and forth isn't a thing. However, they now tell me they are cold at night. Which makes sense. After enduring 117° daytime heat, temperatures down into the 60s at night likely feels ice cold.

Right now they're putting together some money so I can purchase a tent for them. A couple of different ones I found on Amazon fall I to the preferred price range of $25. Or possibly $30 each. Reasonable prices. The quality probably isn't all that great but, you get what you can get.

Anyways, back to the nursing home —-

As I alluded to up above, many residents have been lost in the two years I've been situated at the nursing home. The youngest was 33 years old, meanwhile there's a woman who's 102 years old still making the effort.

My original roommate died (Jeffery). My second roommate died from covid-19. My fourth roommate (Sam) perished six months ago. And so it goes. Vivian, Diane, Shaniqua, and Paul were friends of mine. And then of course, the employee turnover rate is incredible. I'd venture a guess (probably quite accurate) that the average employment duration is no longer than two months. Yes, that's the average. That doesn't include the registry (temp) staffing, and four of those (CBA's) have walked off the job in the past six weeks (mid-shift). Our section (the front) in this unit is treacherous. None of the regular staffing wants to work it, so we've typically got temporary staff assigned to us each morning - and they quickly become overwhelmed / overmatched.

Anyways, this has been a hell of an experience. I do not wish this experience upon anybody… well, besides perhaps The Evil Ex ... also known as ... the mother of my son!

In the least, I hope I've been able to shed some light, even while simultaneously casting lots of shade.

Take care,



Got to admire that cardboard sign.

I wanted to make sure you were aware, @Howard, that Open Medicine Foundation posted a two hour presentation on getting Disability: maybe you should check that out in case something is lurking there....it was on You Tube

I've got nurses coming in to take care of my husband, in theory. We're going through them by the week. Five weeks later, three have disappeared.

Jeff. The first symbolic roommate.
I've got nurses coming in to take care of my husband, in theory. We're going through them by the week. Five weeks later, three have disappeared.

Doesn't surprise me... hopefully you're able to bond with an empathetic nurse that'll keep things afloat / make the effort. :)

I'm in the final stages of the waiting game (was supposed to be decided upon by Sept. 19th at the latest). Either way, I am going to make a go of it (out there in the real world) with or without money or that kind of support. For me, it simply needs to be cool enough outdoors (garage living) for me to survive / thrive.
Doesn't surprise me... hopefully you're able to bond with an empathetic nurse that'll keep things afloat / make the effort. :)
I"m begging them to not fire the ONE NURSE I can stand.

I recall being young and just getting to work was itself, hugely challenging.

My boss suggested if I change the time on my clock, I could arrive places on time.

No that doesn't;t work. Brain deducts the extra hidden minutes, and uses those minutes for last minute necessities.
@Howard Good to read you have been out and about again recently and you take great photos. The Phoenix area looks uniquely beautiful - my husband went there years ago and I was fascinated with his photos of the desertscape scenery and the Saguero (sp?) cacti...

Not up to date with how things work these days, but could you maybe try something like gofundme to help with funds that might enable making the garage habitable longer term? That's if you decide to go with that plan...
Please see new blog entry for exciting details! Okay, perhaps not that exciting, but you need to read to find out...

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