Edited: I posted this in the wrong subforum! Can someone move it for me? Thanks.
A topic I've been thinking about, curious to hear others' experiences (with an especial welcome to more severe sufferers).
Before ME/CFS we all had various ambitions to achieve various goals, even if the goal was to have a good time. As Kurt Vonnegut says, "we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.".
Obviously we've all had to let go of some or all of our old goals. But we generally find new ambitions and new goals even if they are "small".
What I am thinking about is... how has your relationship to ambition itself changed? Do you feel yourself to be more ambitious? Less ambitious? Or is it the same? Is it a good thing to be ambitious? Or do you find it more useful to let go of ambition, or to see it in another way? Do other people see you as more or less ambitious than you were, and what is that like?
If you had strategies to achieve your goals before (e.g., break large things down into small pieces, get social support, research technology, make lists, hone your self-talk,...), are you still using those strategies, or different ones, for your new goals? Why?
For me, I still feel myself to be ambitious but I feel like I fall down a lot because I can't set appropriate goals. Or I set appropriate goals, but then ME happens, so I have to let go of even the little I was trying to do, so I feel crappy because I can't do things. Then it takes a while to build myself up again.
A lot of what normals do to pump themselves up is linked to seeing yourself as ambitious, as an athlete, etc. and pursuing a program, ritual, or routine - think of getting up in the morning to run. But how do you (generally, but also you personally) stay ambitious, and see yourself as ambitious, and keep your eyes on your new goals, when there is so much frustration, variability, and payback from day to day?
I guess I'm looking for some support in holding ambition more loosely without letting go of it. And also I'm just interested to hear how other people are getting on with this sort of thing.
A topic I've been thinking about, curious to hear others' experiences (with an especial welcome to more severe sufferers).
Before ME/CFS we all had various ambitions to achieve various goals, even if the goal was to have a good time. As Kurt Vonnegut says, "we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.".
Obviously we've all had to let go of some or all of our old goals. But we generally find new ambitions and new goals even if they are "small".
What I am thinking about is... how has your relationship to ambition itself changed? Do you feel yourself to be more ambitious? Less ambitious? Or is it the same? Is it a good thing to be ambitious? Or do you find it more useful to let go of ambition, or to see it in another way? Do other people see you as more or less ambitious than you were, and what is that like?
If you had strategies to achieve your goals before (e.g., break large things down into small pieces, get social support, research technology, make lists, hone your self-talk,...), are you still using those strategies, or different ones, for your new goals? Why?
For me, I still feel myself to be ambitious but I feel like I fall down a lot because I can't set appropriate goals. Or I set appropriate goals, but then ME happens, so I have to let go of even the little I was trying to do, so I feel crappy because I can't do things. Then it takes a while to build myself up again.
A lot of what normals do to pump themselves up is linked to seeing yourself as ambitious, as an athlete, etc. and pursuing a program, ritual, or routine - think of getting up in the morning to run. But how do you (generally, but also you personally) stay ambitious, and see yourself as ambitious, and keep your eyes on your new goals, when there is so much frustration, variability, and payback from day to day?
I guess I'm looking for some support in holding ambition more loosely without letting go of it. And also I'm just interested to hear how other people are getting on with this sort of thing.