1. Patients launch $1.27 million crowdfunding campaign for ME/CFS gut microbiome study.
    Check out the website, Facebook and Twitter. Join in donate and spread the word!
Can You Come for a Visit? My ME/CFS Says No
My daughter and son-in-law just had a baby last week. We are thrilled. But we won't be able to see the baby or hold her any time soon. We won't be able to take over little gifts or help out with housework or babysitting.
Discuss the article on the Forums.

The sexual abuse question

Discussion in 'Latest ME/CFS Research' started by Cort, Aug 7, 2009.

  1. Freddd

    Freddd Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,539
    Likes:
    883
    Salt Lake City

    Hi Cort,

    Perhaps some eyeopener's here. Memes carry verbal/cultural information. I was born in 1948 and raised in the 50s in a professional neiborhood in Cleveland Ohio. Let's look at the memes I was raised with and where they were from. My father was raised by his parents in Cleveland. They had come over from Russia in 1910 or 1911 at about the age of 11. They had been raised in rural Russia amid the pogroms. "You are very lucky this is only a belt instead of the razor strop my father had. (thank Gilette for safety razors). My mother raised in suburban Philadelphia in the 1920s by the same nanny who raised her mother who was Geman and trained in the same child rearing methods and school that Hitler's father raised him by, the latest methods in 1880s Germany. Some of the memes from my mother; while painfully scrubbing a face red and raw "This will teach you not to get your face dirty" to 2 year old. "If wishes were horses beggars would ride" when being told why we couldn't have something or something given to us by somebody else was being taken away. All sorts of things were done so as to hurt the child thereby teaching them lessons. Watch the movie MOMMIE DEAREST for the full exposition. In the 1980s when raising my own children my own struggle was to consciously raise my children and NOT pass on those same memes that readily and automatically came up situationally.

    The agricultural community that 90% of the people lived in before mechanized farming supplies the memes for most of America in which women and children are just another kind of livestock. In law, except where it may have been updated, the crime of rape was a property crime against a woman's husband. The initial penetration was the crime; totally irrelavant whether it continued on for hours at that point, was brutal or anything else. That didn't make it worse or anything. He was deprived of his property rights in the first second. That was all that counted in the law. I was renting a fishing boat one day to go fishing on a small lake in Ohio. There were two guys there with 5 children. They were arguing with the rental agent that they need not pay for lifejackets for the children despite the law requiring a lifejacket for each "person" on the boat because "theys not people". Also, they didn't want to pay for the size boat for 7 passengers again becasue the children didn't count as PERSONS.
  2. Cort

    Cort Phoenix Rising Founder

    Messages:
    7,025
    Likes:
    435
    Raleigh, NC
    I was thinking pf poorer communities with higher rates of alcoholism, drug abuse, ill health, crime. Just an idea. Of course it happens in every segment of society.

    Georgia is where one of the CDC's sexual abuse studies was done.

    By the way when I was a kid who went to a summer camp where our counselor made each of us drop your trousers while he rubbed Vaseline over our genitals - telling us it would prevent whatever problem! We didn't even think to question it.
  3. Sing

    Sing Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,301
    Likes:
    422
    New England
    Dear Fredd and Cort,

    I really appreciate both of you being specific about some of your own experiences with child abuse and your terrific responsiveness in general! It helps me to encounter this. I had emotional and sexual abuse in my childhood. Born 1949. Upper middle class suburb of NYC. And yeah, those child-rearing practices!

    But I stand firm in my feeling that physical problems, like ME/CFS, ought to be researched and treated physically. Emotional problems, relationship issues, ought to be treated according to their nature too. Certainly first!

    Cecelia
  4. Freddd

    Freddd Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,539
    Likes:
    883
    Salt Lake City

    Hi Cecelia,

    I agree with you. I don't believe there is any significant connection of causality, unless sicker children were more prone to be abused. My mother resented my illnesses because "It makes me look like a bad mother". She was punishing me for making her look bad. She would never let me stay home just because I said I was ill. No fever by 8:30 am, go to school. When the school nurse called her every time by 10 am, when I developed fever as it just never happened earlier, she resented it and I was in trouble. She also never would take me to the doc until after a full week so it could "get better on it's own" which it never did as it was strep almost always, and I could tell from day 1. We had top notch $25 deductable insurance with first dollar accident in those days and yet she was reluctant to use it so she wouldn't look bad.
  5. Freddd

    Freddd Senior Member

    Messages:
    4,539
    Likes:
    883
    Salt Lake City

    Hi Cort,

    I guess it depends on how he rubbed it on and so forth that might determine just what was going on. I was mortified when I had to go to the camp nurse when I got a bunch of spider bites on scrotum and penis and had to go back 3 times a day to be inspected and have benedryl lotion applied. The big red swellings went down and the crazy itching stopped after a couple of days fortunately. I ALWAYS checked the inside of my bathing suit getting it off the line after that and found spiders several more times. I also had to get scrubbed down with green laundry soap by the camp nurse after an unfortunate incident with considerable poison ivy in my sleeping bag. Instead of punishing the unidentified culprits they made the entire camp sit through a poison ivy film that was a real horror show and it never happened again.

See more popular forum discussions.

Share This Page