thank you Kim! i so appreciate that! that is what i'm wondering, am i so far behind - but where are the other newbies like me who just heard? where are their questions? you have absolutely answered my question very well tho, i thank you. so you are telling? i am not, not yet. i want to, but my husband is quieter about things than i am & i dont' know the implications of talking yet & do not want him any more taxed than he already is by my illness.