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My Friend Got Bit By a Tick And Won't Listen To Me

Carrigon

Senior Member
Messages
808
Location
PA, USA
I am beyond frustrated. One of my friends got bit by a tick a few days ago. He said the tick was on him for over twenty four hours. I begged him to go to the ER or any clinic or doctor and let them treat him for Lyme and coinfections. Well, one of his friends is a nurse. And she actually told him to ignore it, and that you can't get Lyme unless the tick has been on you for three days. Where she came up with that BS, I don't know. But he's listening to her because she is a nurse and he's ignoring me, who is telling him he better get treated and let them see the bite. So he's just not going. And he keeps saying he feels fine. He's healthy to begin with. Well, Lyme, as we all know, can take awhile till you start showing symptoms. And usually by the time the symptoms kick in it can be too late to really stop it and you end up chronic. He won't listen to me. So I'm frustrated and it's out of my hands. I can't force him to get treatment. But what drives me crazy is, he is listening to bad info from a nurse.
 

alex3619

Senior Member
Messages
13,810
Location
Logan, Queensland, Australia
Hi Carrigon, I suspect the nurse is confirming what he already thinks, you are telling him something he does not want to believe. Its hard to break through when this happens. I hope he does not get Lyme disease, but if he does I hope even more he decides to listen to advice from people like you, and then go and investigate the science for himself. Bye, Alex
 

*GG*

senior member
Messages
6,389
Location
Concord, NH
Is he computer savy? Tell him to do his own research if he doesn't believe you. Tell him it could be nothing or it could alter his life forever!

Does he have email? Is there something you could send him, that might convince him to take it more seriously?

GG
 

Carrigon

Senior Member
Messages
808
Location
PA, USA
He's on the pc alot, and he still refuses to do anything but listen to the nurse. That's why I feel frustrated. I can't force him to look at the stuff or anything. He only wants to believe what she told him. And just keeps insisting that he feels fine. He just won't accept that the symptoms can take time to show up.
 
Messages
18
It is hard to fight denial. But stay in friendly contact with him. When/if he starts with symptoms you want to be approachable so you can direct him to a physician who can help him. Plus it takes a few weeks for the immune system to react and show in testing. Even then it may come back negative, so he needs to see a doc who is tick born disease savvy to do a clinical diagnosis and give him the proper treatment.

I hear your frustration. No one wants a loved one have this disease! But hang in there, you may be a help to your friend yet.

Best,
Karen
 

taniaaust1

Senior Member
Messages
13,054
Location
Sth Australia
Not everyone who gets bit by a tick will get lyme. I do hope he's one of the lucky ones and doesnt.

Most people dont like to think they could get sick with something before they do. Its a typical denial thing (stronger as far as medical things go in guys I believe).
 

Athene

ihateticks.me
Messages
1,143
Location
Italy
I can understand your crazy frustration, I would feel the same, but the fact is, you have done all you can. You have your own problems to deal with, let him face his if he thinks he can.

I had a similar situation with a mother at my kid's preschool last year. The teachers asked me to observe the kid because they thought he had the same symptoms as my kid, who has lyme disease-induced autism. The kid obviously has lyme disease, he is covered in erythema migrans rashes apart from having atocious neurological problems and many other textbook symptoms. His mother actually sold her second home to free up money to treat the kid, but chose not to spend a paltry sum on getting a lyme test. It breaks my heart because he is a litle kid with no say in this, who is suffering progressive brain damage and has a mother who is simply too thick to know what advice to follow.
But you know, then I look at my own son, and think of all the cr@pola I have to deal with, and I say, how much spare energy do I really have to take care of other people?

OK, I have vented now.
This does still upset me, but these things are out of our hands.
 

adreno

PR activist
Messages
4,841
You really can't take responsibility for someone else's health. You have done all you can do.
 

Carrigon

Senior Member
Messages
808
Location
PA, USA
I know. My mother's favorite saying was, "You can lead a horse to water, but you can't make him drink." It's true. It all has to be voluntary. But it's totally frustrating to watch someone just ignore something that could be serious and a life destroyer. People who are healthy, they just don't realize they can get sick. This friend, he's had real health his whole life. Like never anything more than a minor cold or headache. He's the type that walks for miles and miles. He can work a fifteen or eighteen hour day. Nothing stops him. So he thinks he's invincible. I guess time will tell on that.
 
Messages
2,565
Location
US
Maybe he would at least watch a video. You could find a good video explaining it. I could see most people not wanting to go to a place, that takes much more effort.

Sadly most people go around in denial, thinking they would never get sick, even when they have evidence. Also some would not believe us because of our invisible illness and brain fog :(