Severe ME Day of Understanding and Remembrance: Aug. 8, 2017
Determined to paper the Internet with articles about ME, Jody Smith brings some additional focus to Severe Myalgic Encephalomyelitis Day of Understanding and Remembrance on Aug. 8, 2017 ...
Discuss the article on the Forums.

Inefficiency is the Enemy of the Sick

Discussion in 'General ME/CFS Discussion' started by u&iraok, Apr 15, 2016.

  1. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    How many times have you had to get a simple errand done or do anything involving the public and it became a time-and-energy sucking fiasco?

    My passport is expiring so I had to get a photo taken. I called the Fed-Ex on the corner, yes they do passport photos. "So if I come in at noon I can get it done?" I asked. "Yes." Great, so easy, I'll be back to work at 12:15, 12:30 at the latest, can still have my lie down like I need to do at lunch.

    Went to the Fed-Ex at noon, 3 people working there, only 1 knows what they're doing so I had to wait for 10 minutes. Thankfully I could sit down. So the employee is ready to help me. She pulls the camera out and it's not charged.

    So I go to the next Fed-Ex not too far away. They're remodeling and don't have the photo section set up. So I go to the next Fed-Ex. "No, we don't do pictures." Go back to the first one to see if the camera is recharged. Yes it is. She tries taking a photo "Oh, it's broken", she says.

    I come back to work and look up where to get passport photos. There's a CVS on my way home. They do passport photos. Go there, get it done, great.

    A few days later I staple my photo to the application, ready to go to the post office. Going over everything to make sure it's all correct. The size of my head in the photo is too big and my application will be rejected if I send it in like this. Now I'm sick or crashing or something and I look really bad so I have to wait to get it redone because if the photo doesn't look like you, it could be a problem. The one I got looks bad enough and my husband says it doesn't look like me!

    So I know this is trivial to the average person, but when you're sick, it's a problem and why I dread doing anything. How about you?
     
  2. JohnCB

    JohnCB Immoderate

    Messages:
    350
    Likes:
    2,566
    England
    Almost all the time! I always look for ways to avoid these stupid problems that fit people think so inconsequential.

    When I last needed passport type photos, I used my camera on self timer to get a decent picture against a plain wall. Then I figured out some measurements and cropped the digital image so that my head was on the right scale, and had regular 6x4 prints made. Then I cut out the section I wanted at the right size. Actually this was the next to last time. Last time I needed an identity photo for a bus pass, I was able to upload the the same digital image I had from before, no print needed.

    Edit: typo.
     
  3. Amaya2014

    Amaya2014 Senior Member

    Messages:
    215
    Likes:
    541
    Columbus, GA
    @u&iraok definitely relate. I just spent roughly two months trying to complete a passport renewal application.

    After weeks of figuring out the requirements I started getting my documents together. Spent another week trying to find my divorce decree because I had a name change. I was about to request another marriage license when I finally found where I misplaced the original.

    In the end, spent considerable time looking at how drastically different I looked over the past decade with my horrible ME/CFS eyes and overall exhausted face.
     
    u&iraok, Mel9 and actup like this.
  4. TiredSam

    TiredSam The wise nematode hibernates

    Messages:
    2,677
    Likes:
    21,535
    Germany
    Damn right. Dealing with incompetence and bureaucracy is annoying enough when you're healthy, but can be impossible with ME. I've been waiting for a bill to be paid by the university for my teaching for weeks now, and it looks like the only way it might happen is if I walk over to accounts to get it sorted in person, as I just found out today that it's been sitting ignored on some idiot's desk for 5 weeks. There is absolutely no way I can manage walking over to accounts and back in one of my breaks between lessons, because I have to go into an office, lock the door and lie on the floor for 20 minutes instead if I'm to have any hope of making it through 6 hours of teaching.

    At the end of the last semester I was examining students and I made some comment to a colleague about not having had a break for a few hours (timetabling was completely unrealistic so we were running late and the planned breaks just got forgotten). I probably sounded like a petty whiner, whereas I was seriously worried about crashing.

    Oh well, probably my fault for keeping my illness a secret. But that's a whole other issue.
     
  5. Sandman00747

    Sandman00747 Senior Member

    Messages:
    101
    Likes:
    472
    United States, Kansas

    Sandman's Law: Nothing can be accomplished on this planet anymore in one attempt!
     
  6. Skippa

    Skippa Anti-BS

    Messages:
    841
    Likes:
    2,960
    This is why we can't pace.
     
  7. SickOfSickness

    SickOfSickness Senior Member

    Messages:
    2,306
    Likes:
    2,241
    US
    Yes, this is so frustrating! Sometimes it's almost as frustrating than the illness.

    But I have friends who are a lot healthier than me, who get really maddened by this too, and even depressed. If one simple errand takes 3 times as long as it should, they get so stressed out because it made them have to reschedule another errand or appointment.

    I try not to stress about it too much, but sometimes I do. That just leads to more PEM. Better to not stress as much as you can, but without letting it all build up inside which is dangerous too :(

    One thing that bothers me is that the illness gives me worse speaking abilities and less tolerance for things like standing, sitting, or walking. If I had better ones, I think I could avoid some of those inefficiencies.

    Also, I hate when people are trying to be helpful, but don't know about my disabilities. There was one time I asked where an item was at the grocery store. The guy told me it was aisle 17, halfway across the store. So mentally I decided, I don't want the item anymore. But he was nice and trying to insist that he would show me where it is, and it was no problem. I ended up following him, but I shouldn't have. It was too much to walk there, and then the item had bad ingredients and I had to walk all the way back.
     
  8. actup

    actup Senior Member

    Messages:
    162
    Likes:
    471
    Pacific NW
    I hate how my precious energy goes toward cleaning up one mess after another when I'm in a crash. Things just fly out of my hands. I'm desperate to reach my bed for some relief and a bowel of soup is suddenly on the carpet or a glass in shards. That's when I turn the air blue. Now I can't take that shower I'd planned or walk to the mailbox later. NOTHING is simple when you're crashed. Btw turning the air blue uses up a lot of energy as well so try hard not to.
     
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2016
  9. Little Bluestem

    Little Bluestem All Good Things Must Come to an End

    Messages:
    4,665
    Likes:
    5,478
    They knew they were taking a passport photo, yet made it the wrong size?!
     
  10. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    Trying to take my own photo would aggravate and tire me more! Wish I could do it, though, glad you could!
     
  11. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    Wasn't that a brain burner and a stress creator reading over the detailed, have-to-be-perfect passport application instructions?

    Your post sounds exactly as though I'd written it (except for me not being a teacher).

    Ironically, I can't even enjoy an extra day off, because I worry so much about my job and if I've left anything or done anything wrong. Partly it's because of my illness, but I'd be that way anyway, so watching customer service be at an all time low and people just not caring is really hard.

    Ha, I need to memorize this maxim and put it where the 'Life is not Fair' maxim that I accepted long ago.

    Thank you, so true.
     
    TiredSam likes this.
  12. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    You know I tell myself not to stress but I just do. :( But so true, if I didn't let it bother me it would reduce the problem. But then it's also knowing that I have to find time and energy to go and do an errand I already worked out trying to fit in and I'm down that extra energy expense. And it weighs on me until I get it done.

    Yes.

    Yes! It's too hard to explain why you can't go along with their help and you end up just doing it to your detriment.
     
    SickOfSickness likes this.
  13. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    I know, right? :confused: Go figure. Or don't bother, it's not worth it. :thumbdown:
     
  14. u&iraok

    u&iraok Senior Member

    Messages:
    427
    Likes:
    501
    U.S.
    Me too! I think, oh I just need to do this and this to clean up the kitchen and then I break or spill something.

    What is 'turning the air blue'? I've never heard that before. Is that where you yell so hard the air turns blue? :depressed:
     
  15. actup

    actup Senior Member

    Messages:
    162
    Likes:
    471
    Pacific NW
    It means about the same as "swearing like a sailor" ;-)
     
    u&iraok and Mel9 like this.

See more popular forum discussions.

Share This Page