Choline on the Brain? A Guide to Choline in Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
http://phoenixrising.me/research-2/the-brain-in-chronic-fatigue-syndrome-mecfs/choline-on-the-brain-a-guide-to-choline-in-chronic-fatigue-syndrome-by-cort-johnson-aug-2005
Discuss the article on the Forums.

I'm freaking out! Juat a little anxiety.....

Discussion in 'Lifestyle Management' started by blazes, Mar 4, 2011.

  1. blazes

    blazes

    Messages:
    32
    Likes:
    0
    Port Aransas, Tx, USA
    ok.....it might not be the exact spot for this topic but I really needed someone to see it sooner than later as my anxiety level is rising daily....along with my blood pressure.

    I got my SA disability hearing date. It's March 24. I do have an attorney. I have an appointment with her a week before the hearing.

    Obviously, she is going to tell me what to expect during that meeting. However, I want to know know. I want to know what my chances are of getting disability vs. being denied. I'm a wreck!

    It's only 2-1/2 weeks away but different scenarios keep popping into my head. Am I expected to do a lot of speaking during this hearing? Cuz, I will probably have stomach issues from nerves if I do...see....I'm freaking out!

    Help! Lol
    Kimberly
     
  2. blazes

    blazes

    Messages:
    32
    Likes:
    0
    Port Aransas, Tx, USA
    thanks

    Just thought I would say thanks for the support. I see several people read the post but nobody had anything to say? Not a "hang in there"? Nothing.....its been a while since I have posted on here. It might be a while before I come back.
     
  3. LaurelW

    LaurelW Senior Member

    Messages:
    598
    Likes:
    225
    Utah
    Hi Kimberly,
    Sorry to hear about what a wreck you are. It's a difficult process to go through considering your future hangs in the balance. I actually had to have two hearings because I got turned down the first time. I remember speaking at the first one but not at the second. The SSA changed the guidelines in between, making it easier for people with CFS to get approved. I know it's hair-raising, but hang in there. Hopefully your lawyer will do a good job. I'm rooting for you.:victory:

    P.S. I think it took your post a while to appear--I've been checking off and on all afternoon and just now saw it.
     
  4. paclabman

    paclabman

    Messages:
    57
    Likes:
    3
    Seattle area
    I'm waiting to hear on some LTD issues and have a lot of anxiety. I think freaking out is normal.

    Well ... really ... no one can predict the outcome cause no one is familiar with the specifics of your case. I haven't been thru a hearing since i was approved before that stage.

    Remember for things like ME/CFS, any diagnoses don't matter that much. The main thing is how you are able to function and how your conditions prevent you from working.

    Maybe someone who has been thru a hearing can give more info. But I think there will be a vocational resource person there that evaluates your job skills and capacity to work. Hopefully your documentation gives info on your residual funcational capacity. In general, if you are 55 or over that helps cause you are less adaptable. The more education you have, then you are probably better able to adapt.

    I'd get up and stretch if you need to.

    I think that maybe you shouldn't be so disappointed - people who really aren't familiar with your case can't do much more than give a few generalities.
     
  5. *GG*

    *GG* Moderator

    Messages:
    6,216
    Likes:
    4,849
    Concord, NH
    I have not gone thru SSI disability, but i wouldn't think that you will speak all that much. I just did a basic search, and it appears that this website has lots of info:
    http://fmcfsme.com/articles_disability_info.php

    I have read that documentation is very important, regular Drs visits and what your limitations are on a continuing basis. There is a 2 day in a row exercise test that demonstrates how our bodies do not bounce back. Research Pacific Fatigue Lab in California.
     
  6. *GG*

    *GG* Moderator

    Messages:
    6,216
    Likes:
    4,849
    Concord, NH
    I see the anxiety thing is for real! Have you ever tried meditation? I takes lots of practice, but I think it has helped me. You have to kind and gentle with yourself!

    Ever since I was out of work for 3 mos due to a massive flare/deteriotation. I am trying to roll with the punches. I was just punched by my employer yesterday, but it's only money!

    GG
     
  7. blazes

    blazes

    Messages:
    32
    Likes:
    0
    Port Aransas, Tx, USA
    I have to apologize

    I am truly sorry for my "outburst". It had been building up for about a week and I had been asking questions and trying to do research on my dinosaur of a computer. I am logging in now on my cell phone, which likes to auto-correct me inappropriately by the way.

    I lashed out here. When I was a frequent visitor I did some "simple comforting" because sometimes that's all someone is looking for. I'm not sure if that's what I was looking for or not but knowing that people here at least know what I'm talking about helps.

    I am usually very calm about the thing I can no longer do. I can't change some of it so I have to accept it and move on. Some thing we just have to work with what we have left and hope it gets better or stronger. I no longer cry "why me?" Because I would much rather it be me than someone else I love.

    Thank you for not coming down too hard on me for throwing a tantrum. I promise you I don't do them often.

    Be Well.
    Kimberly
     
  8. Victoria

    Victoria Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,373
    Likes:
    311
    Melbourne, Australia
    Kimberly,

    It's always hard waiting for an appointment/case hearing (or test results).

    The clock seems to be on 'go slow'.

    You know that saying A watched kettle never boils........well, a watched clock never seems to tick (either).

    Do your best to find some do-able activities to fill the next couple of weeks to try & take your mind off the future hearing. While I could say there's no point worrying about what hasn't happened yet...., I know from experience that you (like me & nearly everyone else) will worry.

    Whatever happens, will happen. Whatever decision the court comes to, will be decided.

    Just be prepared. Ensure your attorney has all the relevant information on their desk beforehand. Medical records & history of your illness. If necessary, sit down with pen & paper (or computer) & do a list of every way your illness has impacted your life. List all the things that you can't do anymore. List the emotional, as well as the physical impact (as well as financial impact). If you have family dependant on you, ensure this is relayed to the court.

    If you have no family or friends to support you & need social services to help, ensure that this is clear in your mind before the court day. If you have memory or cognitive issues, take a concise page of short notes to jog your memory (if it is callled upon).

    If you have to speak or answer questions, speak slowly & clearly.

    Only answer the questions (if they are put to you), don't speak about issues which aren't relevant. Choose your words carefully (if you have to speak). Don't be vague.

    If necessary, prepare a list of questions for your attorney to answer in that meeting (the week before). Ensure you understand the procedure on the day of the court hearing. If you don't, ask your attorney beforehand.

    Try & take a family member or friend to support you in the courtroom.

    Worrying won't change the outcome, it will just aggravate your symptoms.

    Just hang in there & hope for the best (but be prepared for the worst).

    And if you don't at first succeed, try, try again. I've never been to court so don't know what happens, but if you & your attorney are well prepared, you can't do any better than that.

    Good luck!
     
  9. LaurelW

    LaurelW Senior Member

    Messages:
    598
    Likes:
    225
    Utah
    Yes, and remember that even if they turn you down, you can always start another case. A pain and expensive, but do-able. I had to. Hope you don't!
     
  10. Esther12

    Esther12 Senior Member

    Messages:
    8,449
    Likes:
    28,523
    Difficult to know what to advice with anxiety about things like this. Applying for disability benefits with CFS is inevitably pretty stressful.

    It's best to remember that you can decide what you think about. If you think that you're thoughts are wasting time and energy, then you can decide to think about something else. The trouble with situations like this is that it's easy to legitimise your stressing, as if you're preparing arguments... and some preperation is necessasy. Distinguishing helpful thinking from counter-productive stressing is not always as easy as it should be! If you're feeling over stressed, I'd take that as a sign that you've got the balance a bit wrong, and should work towards letting go of some of those unhelpful thoughts.

    (Ugh - what confused advice. I knew I'd struggle to write a worthwhile post here!)
     
  11. kurt

    kurt Senior Member

    Messages:
    1,137
    Likes:
    217
    Syracuse, Utah, USA
    Kimberly, I know EXACTLY how you feel and went through that process some years ago. Each case is probably different and a lot depends on who is the judge in your case. I was told by multiple attorneys they could never predict the outcome of a SSA disability hearing, and that any application for disability from CFS was hard to win. Well, I won my case and I hope you win yours. I was a bit of a wreck during my hearing. I was getting verbal overload from the fast pace, and at one point asked the Judge if we could have a 2-3 minute pause. I had to put my head down and breathe. He seemed a little put out by that, but also I saw a light go off. Then later I had to ask permission to put my feet up. The judge shifted his tone and asked a question about my health (gasp, how did he know?). The story started earlier, before this hearing I had been scheduled for another judge, and while waiting for that hearing I crashed, had to put some chairs together and lay down in the court's foyer. All these other disabled people waiting for their cases were staring at me, it was almost comical to compare my level of disability with theirs, they were walking around complaining, I was barely holding everything together. I think my judge must have heard about that, anyway that session got cancelled due to a no-show on the part of the court. And just getting there was hard, the farthest I had been able to ride in a car in over 5 years, I had terrible anxiety, etc. But what got me through all this, was the realization that my ridiculous presence was a testament to my condition. The judge could see with his own eyes I had a serious problem. The summary: having anxiety, even crashing during a hearing, is all part of what you are there for, to let a human being see with his/her own eyes what your condition has done to you.

    Of course, answering the questions properly is important. My advice is to be careful to keep the focus on how your CFS prevents you from having any job in the economy. Do not get mixed up about why you are there and talk about CFS, which is easy with CFS because we are so conditioned to being attacked because our illness is socially maligned. But the nature of CFS is not at issue in a SSA court case, there are already statutes that say they can give disability for CFS, the judge will/should know that. Your inability to work because of CFS is what matters. There are some CFS patients who can work, and some who can not, and you belong to the latter group, that is the ONLY thing you have to prove. So I would just try to focus on the inability to work in every response, not so much on the illness itself. The judge can't determine anything medical, but a judge and/or the court's occupational specialist, can tell when something is really wrong with your ability to work.

    The SSA court hearing is the one time you don't have to try to pass for normal, you just can be your regular CFS self...that is what they need to see.
     
  12. blazes

    blazes

    Messages:
    32
    Likes:
    0
    Port Aransas, Tx, USA
    The light bulb goes on!!!

    Kurt!
    Can I just say that is exactly what I needed to know and didn't know how to ask for it! I was so unaware of what the process or ....lack of words here.....that I was spinning out of control. Victoria & many others have also given me some very good advice to stay calm but I really was looking for information from someone who has been through it.

    So I don't have to try to be strong and.keep my added brain together when its fogged up. It's such a blessing to hear that!

    I am copying your post, as I did Victoria's, and e-mailing it to myself. Thank you!

    Kimberly
     

See more popular forum discussions.

Share This Page