I'm not sure if I’m looking for advice, just need to vent, or just need write this down so that I get it out of my head. But any advice would be welcome. I don't have a large circle of friends, but the few I have just don't seem to get that I'm unwell. Over the past 5 years haven’t seen each other very often, I usually try to get in touch when I'm feeling ok, but dew to working different shifts we don't get together often, and when plans are made they are usually lose plans and end up not happening (due to friend having other commitments and cancelling). Recently they want to get together more often, unfortunately I've been going though a bad spell, and can't commit to plans as I don't know if I will be well enough on the day. I tell them to make the plans without me and I'll let them know on the the day if I'm coming along. This usually results in loads of text during the run up asking if i'm going, and a lot of 'o come on'. (I don't like being nagged even when i'm feeling ok). I keep being made to feel like i'm being a party pooper. To top it off I'm partly sighted and they don't seem to get that this creates problems too. They want to go to bingo, and I struggle with keeping up with the callers as I cant find the number fast enough, and I have to think fast at work (checkout in a buzzy shop) so after work i'm mentally drained and my brain has had enough. They keep telling me that it's 'not about if you good at it, it's about having a fun night out', but its not fun it's just exhausting. I really don't know what to do any more, I just feel lousy every time I see them now. Ok, vent over for now, thanks for reading.