Hi I am a 23 year old male who has been sick for around 12 years. I have been diagnosed with POTS Major depressive disorder, PANDAS, OCD, contested EDS, Craniocervical fusion, and chronic head pain of unknown origion among other things. Ever since I got ill I started to feel like my brain wasn't working. I became dissasociated like everything felt strange to me in my life. Like my memory of myself and my friends was gone. My mind felt sedated. It felt like no thoughts were going on in my head. I became much less talkative and lost all my friends because I could not speak to them. Because I didn't feel good and because I did not know what to say to them. It became an effort to think. Everytime I tried to think I felt I couldnt like there was a wall blocking my thoughts. If you asked me to try to imagine a car moving in my head I would try to focus and literally be straining to try to get the image into my head. But it takes so much effort i cannot. It is like that with everything the Stop.Try to think. And then distortion in that order. I also do not daydream since ive been ill always thought that was odd. I cannot ponder things it feels like its all in my subconscious. Like my subconscious is working and I can answer peoples questions and talk briefly but anything deep like pondering or imagining or visualizing I cannot do. It is terrible. Now im hoping that treating the pandas will help this I am going to be doing rituximab for it but no one knows. I have other symptoms but will save for later if anyone is curious. ' Thank you.