Severe ME Day of Understanding and Remembrance: Aug. 8, 2017
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Anyone have a personal assistaint or cargiver?

Discussion in 'Lifestyle Management' started by Offset Entity, Sep 22, 2017.

  1. Jennifer J

    Jennifer J Senior Member

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    Southern California
    At that time I had to give copies to an agency that was able to help me then and pay for my help. It did make me feel more comfortable having copies of both though if anything happened.

    I'm not sure if I was able to pay cash for help if I'd be comfortable asking for those, yet it does seem like a good idea if something goes wrong. Having it gave me a little extra security for various reasons.

    @tudiemoore, that sounds like a very interesting job, hard and rewarding, too!

    @Offset Entity, I know it's hard when you're so limited and really need help. There's more I want to say but my brain just stopped, can't access the words.

    We're here for you.
     
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  2. Offset Entity

    Offset Entity

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    @tudiemoore @Jennifer J Thank you for you kind thoughtful replies.


    I got an update on the situation
    Had a great day with her help, shes coming back tomorrow afternoon to help some more and join me and my partner for dinner (shes cooking/cleaning)
    shes totally cool with giving me a copy of her ID and some contact info to leave with my parents. she also had the great idea of her having my parents numbers in case im having an emergency/issue lol i hadn't even thought of that.

    Things are looking really good. i just gotta keep reminding myself to be cautious and take things slow no matter how positive it all seems now.
     
  3. Offset Entity

    Offset Entity

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    UPDATE

    been working with my new caretaker for 2 weeks now. she is so awesome. we get so much done and she is so happy with the perks and pay she has often said she feels bad taking money from me, while at the same time i wish i could afford to pay her more!

    honestly now im worried im gonna loose her when she gets a real job lol

    Shes not really a computer/business assistant like i wanted but she is a phenomenal caretaker and that is what i really needed. Shes gonna be coming over 2 mornings to make breakfast and do a small chores before her other job in addition to one full day to take me on errands, prep meals and take care of the big chores. She is super understanding and gets along well with my partner and my parents.

    ive actually gotten another reply to the ad and this person sounds more tech savvy and younger. id like to take her on as well to do more business stuff but i cant really justify that when my websites aren't even live yet, let alone making profits.

    best wishes to you all.
    -Offset
     
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  4. Offset Entity

    Offset Entity

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    i thought id update u guys cause im a little bummed out and felt like sharing.

    everything was going great for the last while with the caregiver. she was kind, thoughtful and took a lot of chores off my plate so i could focus on recovering and working on projects and things. i dont drive and she was helping me get around to errands and grocery shop which made my life so much easier. its sucks taking the bus to the grocery store and the driver apps are pretty pricey :(

    anyway i spent the first few weeks "training" her and getting to know her and i consider her a friend at this point. we even went out for a drink together after work a couple times when i felt up for it.

    Ive started relying on her the last month and was so happy with how thing were going. just this last week i started fully trusting her in my room on her own and with my more personal/delicate chores.

    Then today a few hours after leaving she calls and quits :( she says its for health reasons and shes going to the hospital as we speak. she didnt give me more detail she just apologized a few times and didnt give further explanation.

    Im dealing with alot of stuff at the moment in addition to my health things and really didnt need this right now. i feel like ive lost a friend as well as a valuable resource. not to mention i am worried about her well being and hope she is doing better soon, i wish there was something i could do for her but the way she was talking i got the vibe she didnt want to involve me. she made it sound like i wouldnt be seeing her again even when i offered to just meet socially when she feels up for it in the future.

    not really sure what im gonna do about all this. i was feeling pretty overwhelmed and overworked even with her help and am barely managing to stop myself from crashing as it is. i feel like if i dont get some help soon either my body or my responsibilities are gonna crash hard and fast.
    I dont really have the energy right now to build trust and negotiate with a new person even if i did manage to find someone right away.

    right now im thinking about whether i should disregard my responsibilities and rest or push through it and crash :_(
    i may try to look for another person to fill her place but i dont think it will be easy. i only got 3 responses to my CL add last time and 1 of them was a guy saying im crazy for expecting someone to help in my price range .

    anyway not feeling so great sorry for rant tired myself out dont wanna reread it sorry if it reads bad

    Thanks guys!@
     

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