I get this thing where I feel like muscles/veins/nerves are out of place, especially in my shoulder which I have overused and slightly injured previously(shoulder seperation). My entire body often feels out of balance. Everything feels "off" and itchy/tight. Certain muscles get very tight and stabalizer muscles stop functioning that well.
This leads to me forcibly using leverage, muscle tightning, and stretching to move stuff around. I think especially my blood vessels move around since messing with my shoulder and arm leads to pulling in my leg. Often my ribs pop out of move around while doing this, for some reason my ribs on my ride side are all messed up and have very poor tendon/joints. I also mess with my jaw quite often, and I can feel nerves/blood vessels move around. All my body seems very mobile. It doesn't hurt at all but I feel it damages my body. I think something is wrong with my body because I honestly think it should hurt.
I can't stop messing with my shitty body, it's like fidgetting. I get very this bad body uncomfortable sensation at least once a month, sometimes more. I think me doing this is further injuring my tendons and body tissues. Sometimes I worry that I'l end up eventually ripping a blood vessel and get internal bleeding.
I think this is all because of viral nerve damage/infection/autoimmunity, muscles tightning up, being in bed 23 hours a day, very poor cellular health etc. Basically my whole musculoskeletal system is messing up. Who knows maybe I have autoimmunity for a certain receptor in my body and that is confusing my brain into moving everything incorrectly.
This is something I really worry about, if my body starts collapsing even more, becoming even more uncomfortable, that would be hell.
I really try to just lay still, not mess with anything, but I keep doing it anyways. Fuck.
This leads to me forcibly using leverage, muscle tightning, and stretching to move stuff around. I think especially my blood vessels move around since messing with my shoulder and arm leads to pulling in my leg. Often my ribs pop out of move around while doing this, for some reason my ribs on my ride side are all messed up and have very poor tendon/joints. I also mess with my jaw quite often, and I can feel nerves/blood vessels move around. All my body seems very mobile. It doesn't hurt at all but I feel it damages my body. I think something is wrong with my body because I honestly think it should hurt.
I can't stop messing with my shitty body, it's like fidgetting. I get very this bad body uncomfortable sensation at least once a month, sometimes more. I think me doing this is further injuring my tendons and body tissues. Sometimes I worry that I'l end up eventually ripping a blood vessel and get internal bleeding.
I think this is all because of viral nerve damage/infection/autoimmunity, muscles tightning up, being in bed 23 hours a day, very poor cellular health etc. Basically my whole musculoskeletal system is messing up. Who knows maybe I have autoimmunity for a certain receptor in my body and that is confusing my brain into moving everything incorrectly.
This is something I really worry about, if my body starts collapsing even more, becoming even more uncomfortable, that would be hell.
I really try to just lay still, not mess with anything, but I keep doing it anyways. Fuck.