Hi everyone,
I am not sure if it would be appropriate for this topic to be in this section of the board, but I am in need of some advice for a life long decision. I apologize for the long post but I feel it's required to give some context to my situation.
To make a long story short, I first got ME/CFS symptoms in my mid 20s (full story here http://forums.phoenixrising.me/index.php?threads/can-overtraining-syndrome-cause-me-cfs.9075/). Since then, I have been given a "possible mild ME/CFS diagnosis" because not all the symptoms are there but the PEM is definitely present. Due to ME/CFS symptoms, I avoided getting into relationships because of the fear of being a burden to potential partners and not being able to give them the attention and effort that a healthy relationship deserves. Now in my 30s, I've started to come to accept my limitations and decided to put myself out there to see if I can find someone that would accept me despite my shortcomings. Fortunately I did and things have been going great for the past 6 months. However, with dating comes the question of intimacy. I started looking into detail whether ME/CFS is contagious and fortunately (or unfortunately), there is no concrete answer to this question. As some of you might've noticed, there is a separate thread I made with regards to ME/CFS transmission.
Here is where I ask of everyone's advice. Although statistics show that the majority of non-gentic family members remain healthy, there are still studies that show a small percentage of spouses/partners becoming ill with either ME/CFS or similar symptoms. I am going through the dilemma of WHAT IF (despite the small odds) she gets sick from me? The selfish side of me says to have a talk with her and if she's ok with it, we continue on. The logical side of me says to make the decision for the both of us and walk away from this because I would never be able to forgive myself if she did get sick. If I walk away from her, I am pretty much making the decision to remain single for the rest of my life. I then ask myself the question if it's worth throwing everything away for a "WHAT IF".
I personally think this is a very hard decision and therefore any feedback from everyone would be much appreciated. Thank you again and I look forward to your responses.
I am not sure if it would be appropriate for this topic to be in this section of the board, but I am in need of some advice for a life long decision. I apologize for the long post but I feel it's required to give some context to my situation.
To make a long story short, I first got ME/CFS symptoms in my mid 20s (full story here http://forums.phoenixrising.me/index.php?threads/can-overtraining-syndrome-cause-me-cfs.9075/). Since then, I have been given a "possible mild ME/CFS diagnosis" because not all the symptoms are there but the PEM is definitely present. Due to ME/CFS symptoms, I avoided getting into relationships because of the fear of being a burden to potential partners and not being able to give them the attention and effort that a healthy relationship deserves. Now in my 30s, I've started to come to accept my limitations and decided to put myself out there to see if I can find someone that would accept me despite my shortcomings. Fortunately I did and things have been going great for the past 6 months. However, with dating comes the question of intimacy. I started looking into detail whether ME/CFS is contagious and fortunately (or unfortunately), there is no concrete answer to this question. As some of you might've noticed, there is a separate thread I made with regards to ME/CFS transmission.
Here is where I ask of everyone's advice. Although statistics show that the majority of non-gentic family members remain healthy, there are still studies that show a small percentage of spouses/partners becoming ill with either ME/CFS or similar symptoms. I am going through the dilemma of WHAT IF (despite the small odds) she gets sick from me? The selfish side of me says to have a talk with her and if she's ok with it, we continue on. The logical side of me says to make the decision for the both of us and walk away from this because I would never be able to forgive myself if she did get sick. If I walk away from her, I am pretty much making the decision to remain single for the rest of my life. I then ask myself the question if it's worth throwing everything away for a "WHAT IF".
I personally think this is a very hard decision and therefore any feedback from everyone would be much appreciated. Thank you again and I look forward to your responses.
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