I have physically taken a little dip. I was exercising doing weights and after I was done, my HR went up for a while while I was taking a shower, and I could not get it down. Is not like u can lay down on a public bathroom! so I hold it up for a long time until I could get back to office and put feet up.
I have been down ever since, but not too bad. Now this has a whole psychological ramification. I realize I am doing well but how fragile it all is. I am socializing too, going to the movies, friends gathering....
The intensity of crash and suffering I get today, is the same as when I was really sick so I wonder if the socializing is worth the payback.
That is worrying me a little because I find myself lately not wanting to do much socially. Overall I am good and except for the mood swings I am pretty good. I go from wow I am lucky that having CFS I can do all this stuff, to a pessimistic feeling that even though I am better I will always crash and have painful payback.
I am trying not to be too hard on myself, after all humans get conditioned psy by pain. So I guess my reaction to action / consequence is very normal. Activity = pain! So I have to rationalize myself and work on that. But I guess I need to accept my mood swings and move forward. My main symptom right now is the head and spine burning.
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The Physical Vs psy issues
Blog entry posted by lnester7, May 25, 2013.