...so this is what normal feels like.
I can't tell you how many times I've had that thought in the past couple months. It's somewhat akin to the sense of coming home after a long trip, and yet somehow it seems better than it ever was before.
When I first began this treatment, the initial sense was that it's relieving my symptoms. I didn't know if it would go beyond that and actually make a permanent change, but I figured that anything that makes things easier on my body is good.
Then I began to notice actual improvements. Life became so much nicer without serious crises around every bend, and I began to relax into the ease of just plain not suffering as much.
Not too long ago, I felt myself beginning to turn another corner, and it's in full swing - the reawakening of normalcy.
I did a load of laundry, for the first time in 6 1/2 years.Then, a week later, I did another one.And then another one.And another.
Looks like I have no reason to stop.
I've pulled the coverings off the windows, and now natural light comes through for the first time. It's gorgeous. What last year would have put me on the floor, curled in a ball, screaming, now fills me with a sense of awe and wonder.
I've retired my cane, and the wheelchair is only working part time. Twice, now, I have gone shopping [insert jaw drop] and without any assistive aid other than my lovely caregiver, who lent me an arm once or twice. And guess what - it was fun!
Slowly, I'm re-entering the world of the well. It's not all coming back at once - interacting with people is currently a tricky one, still. But it's happening. I just need to keep resting and letting my body put itself back together under this treatment. I'm so blessed.
Learning "Normal" Again
Blog entry posted by Dainty, Oct 16, 2012.
About the Author
Dainty became ill as a teenager and spent 7 years mostly bedridden from ME/CFS, life-threatening MCS reactions, extreme food allergies/sensitivities, cognitive impairment, fibromyalgia, episodes of temporary paralysis and various unexplained emergencies. The past 5 years she has experienced profound improvement from various treatment approaches. With homelessness and PTSD presenting as significant obstacles, she continues to pursue healing full time and find incorrigible opportunities to enjoy life.