2 weeks on high dose valcyte and I seem to have fallen into a pattern of one lousy day followed by one better day. This seems likely to be due simply to the fact that I have spent my bad days mostly resting, so I feel better the next day. Whereas I spend good days trying to do everything that didn't get done on the bad days so I crash the following day. I keep trying to tell myself to slow down and take it easy, even when I am feeling a bit better, but it is SO hard for me to do that. For one thing, I am kind of a hyper person who has trouble sitting still unless I am forced too. I also just want to be able to live a normal life, even if it is only on alternate days. I have to get myself into a more long-term mindset. Today was a good day, but I tried not to push myself too hard.
Of course, another possibility is that I feel better when I take xanax the night before because my sleep is better, but I try not to take it 2 nights in a row because of the dependence issue. I do take seroquel and ibuprofin every night and sometimes benedryl when I don't take xanax. My best sleep is when I take 2 xanax, but that is the nuclear option that I save for when my sleep has been terrible a few days in a row.
Blog entry posted by vamah, Sep 12, 2013.